I was a kid with big dreams. Fashion was both an inspiration and an escape from my humdrum life.

Hi everyone, this is the prompt for Vassar's writing supplement: How did you learn about Vassar and what aspect of our college do you find appealing? (Limit 350 words)

I would love to get some feedback/thoughts/opinions on my response and anything I could change to make it better!

My essay response below:
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I was a dreamy kid with big dreams. Fashion was both an inspiration and an escape from my humdrum life. I devoured everything fashion related, from magazines to books, and one of those books was The Devil Wears Prada, the iconic novel-turned-movie. In the book, the protagonist Andy befriends a beauty editor named James, a Vassar graduate at the fictional magazine Runway. That was a place where I imagined I wanted to be in ten years, so I believed Vassar could be the right place in my trajectory there.

Fast forward to today - my interests have shifted organically from fashion to sociocultural and gender issues. This is due to both connecting my personal experiences to an intellectual curiosity and having experienced a part of the [fashion] industry and its work, which revealed how insincere and shallow some people in the industry could be.

While my interests have changed, Vassar, however, still seems to be the right place for me. The academic freedom of a liberal arts education at Vassar would nurture my intellectual curiosity to explore various fields of study, and also combine all of my interests in an interdisciplinary manner. Looking at Vassar's course catalogue, I saw courses like "Perspectives in Deviant Subculture", "Language, Gender and Media", and "The Art of Reading and Writing". Imagining learning about, deconstructing and discussing these concepts across disciplines such as Sociology, Anthropology and English in an intimate class of passionate students brought a heady rush, much like flipping through fashion magazines as a form of escapism did when I was younger.

When I was younger, dreaming was a form of escapism for me because I wasn't where I wanted to be. At Vassar, dreaming would no longer be a device for escapism, but for imagining new ideas and concepts. It will not be needed because I will be where I want to be, fully engaged with the education at Vassar by being part of an intellectual community who wants to learn for the sake of learning.

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Thank you!

While my interests have changed, Vassar, however, still seems to be the right place for me. The academic freedom of a liberal arts education at Vassar would nurture my intellectual curiosity to explore various fields of study, and also combine all of my interests in an interdisciplinary manner. Looking at Vassar's course catalogue, I saw courses like "Perspectives in Deviant Subculture", "Language, Gender and Media", and "The Art of Reading and Writing". Imagining learning about, deconstructing and discussing these concepts across disciplines such as Sociology, Anthropology and English in an intimate class of passionate students brought a heady rush, much like flipping through fashion magazines as a form of escapism did when I was younger.

I think you should discuss how these courses will help you achieve what you want. Other than that I love it and the conclusion is great!

I think you should point out what has made your interest shifts, it may be something interesting that will draw the attention to your essay.

When I was younger, dreaming was a form of escapism for me because I wasn't where I wanted to be. At Vassar, dreaming would no longer be a device for escapism, but for imagining new ideas and concepts. It will not be needed because I will be where I want to be, fully engaged with the education at Vassar by being part of an intellectual community who wants to learn for the sake of learning.

--> I suggest you shorten this paragraph : When I was younger, dreaming was a form of escapism because I wasn't where I wanted to be. At Vassar, dreaming would no longer be an escape, but a way to create new ideas and concepts. Because I will be where I want to be, fully engaged with the Vassar's intellectual community who wants to learn for the sake of learning.

Best of luck with your application!