1. Tell us about an intellectual experience, project, class, or book that has influenced or inspired you.
I often regarded myself as a liberal person, not so much bounded to stereotypes and social expectations. One day, however, I couldn't help but cast a doubt to this self-awareness as soon as I started to read Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov, a story of a middle aged man's craving toward a girl. Could I really accept this book as a pure literary work, of a passionate love, over my uncomfortable feelings? What would I get from this adulterous story? Feeling like committing a crime, I gradually put myself into the story with seething heart.
At the beginning of Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov, Humbert, the main character, falls for a young girl who is enough to be his daughter-- or even granddaughter. Such an unconventional theme was quite suggestive, as society expects two people in a relationship to be of a similar age. "What a perverted lunatic!" I exclaimed in a small voice, imagining this guy's following young girl with his corrupted eyes. His mad admiration for Lo, calling her as his "light of life, fire of loins, sin, and soul," and his masochistic self-deprecation reinforced my belief.
Over the time, I felt myself limitlessly absorbed in the character, and I finally became Humbert himself. Looking Lo's corrupted, angelic eyes vividly, I couldn't help but understood the beauty of Humbert's fervent admiration for Lo which I was uncomfortable with at the beginning; the more I read, the more I was astonished to feel the daunting weigh of this passionate love. When Humbert admitted the fact that Lolita would never love him, I was mesmerized with his ineffable sad obsession; whenever he said "oh my little nymphet, my corrupted goddess (Nabokov 228)," I felt my heart hurt with even more complicated emotions, that I could not explain. By the end of the book, I felt like I just rode the biggest rollercoaster, of emotion, in the world. The fascination I felt about this love sometimes led me to sympathize with him, sometimes evoked nausea, and occasionally caused me to feel his frustration. These various waves of emotions were something that I had never experienced before.
There have been countless books in which I have earned moral,
educational, or social lessons. However, no book had so challenged my belief and hardened my self-awareness through the challenge: yes, I could accept Lolita as a pure literary work, of a passionate love and scathing emotions, keeping my prejudice about the taboo of a man's love toward a young girl aside: I didn't care if Humbert was over a hundred years old or something-it just didn't matter, because no book but Lolita had absorbed me so deeply, introducing me to the world of seething emotions; and without a doubt, this book elevated the depth of my emotional experience significantly, and hardened my self-identification at the same time.
---------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------
i am not really crazy about my essay, because i can't hear much of my voice. How can i improve this voice problem? help!!!
I often regarded myself as a liberal person, not so much bounded to stereotypes and social expectations. One day, however, I couldn't help but cast a doubt to this self-awareness as soon as I started to read Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov, a story of a middle aged man's craving toward a girl. Could I really accept this book as a pure literary work, of a passionate love, over my uncomfortable feelings? What would I get from this adulterous story? Feeling like committing a crime, I gradually put myself into the story with seething heart.
At the beginning of Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov, Humbert, the main character, falls for a young girl who is enough to be his daughter-- or even granddaughter. Such an unconventional theme was quite suggestive, as society expects two people in a relationship to be of a similar age. "What a perverted lunatic!" I exclaimed in a small voice, imagining this guy's following young girl with his corrupted eyes. His mad admiration for Lo, calling her as his "light of life, fire of loins, sin, and soul," and his masochistic self-deprecation reinforced my belief.
Over the time, I felt myself limitlessly absorbed in the character, and I finally became Humbert himself. Looking Lo's corrupted, angelic eyes vividly, I couldn't help but understood the beauty of Humbert's fervent admiration for Lo which I was uncomfortable with at the beginning; the more I read, the more I was astonished to feel the daunting weigh of this passionate love. When Humbert admitted the fact that Lolita would never love him, I was mesmerized with his ineffable sad obsession; whenever he said "oh my little nymphet, my corrupted goddess (Nabokov 228)," I felt my heart hurt with even more complicated emotions, that I could not explain. By the end of the book, I felt like I just rode the biggest rollercoaster, of emotion, in the world. The fascination I felt about this love sometimes led me to sympathize with him, sometimes evoked nausea, and occasionally caused me to feel his frustration. These various waves of emotions were something that I had never experienced before.
There have been countless books in which I have earned moral,
educational, or social lessons. However, no book had so challenged my belief and hardened my self-awareness through the challenge: yes, I could accept Lolita as a pure literary work, of a passionate love and scathing emotions, keeping my prejudice about the taboo of a man's love toward a young girl aside: I didn't care if Humbert was over a hundred years old or something-it just didn't matter, because no book but Lolita had absorbed me so deeply, introducing me to the world of seething emotions; and without a doubt, this book elevated the depth of my emotional experience significantly, and hardened my self-identification at the same time.
---------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------
i am not really crazy about my essay, because i can't hear much of my voice. How can i improve this voice problem? help!!!