"a little eccentric and wild" - Stanford Roommate Essay

Prompt: Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate - and us - know you better.

Hola roomie!

Let me start off by saying Congratulations! I hope we make the best of these years living together!
I was born and raised in Texas but don't worry, I'm nowhere near being a cowgirl! Being the first child in my family to go to college though, I will be leaving them and all my friends back home. Therefore, I might be Skyping or talking to them a lot!

To be honest, I am what some people may call a "health freak". I have been a vegetarian for almost 2 years now and plan to go vegan sometime within the next. You don't have to eat any of my food but I would be happy to cook some for you if you want.

I hate being stuck indoors, so whenever the weather is nice I would love to go exploring! I like to run, play soccer, skateboard, etc., I'm also very willing to try new things. Furthermore, I'd like to get to know San Jose and San Francisco better, maybe we can do that together!

I hope you like music because I can't go a day without listening to it. I collect CD's and I will be bringing them with me so we'll always have something to play. I also enjoy going to concerts, you are welcome to come with me!

I adore foreign languages and cultures, and you'll probably end up knowing quite a bit of Spanish at the end of the year due to my knack for speaking it to everyone! If you have anything to share as well I would love to experience it!

In terms of cleanliness, I am fairly organized in all aspects not including my closet. Our room may appear cluttered, but it's really just a thin layer of clothes. I shall try my hardest to keep them out of the way for you though.

Although I may get a little eccentric and wild at times, I've always been a fairly agreeable person so with any luck I hope we turn out to be good friends!

See you soon!
Megan

Anything I should change?
Is it too jumpy?
Most importantly, do you feel like you know me through it?

Thanks for the help!

You introduce a lot of aspects of yourself. You should make them more unique to yourself. For example, I would suspect that a lot of people cannot live without plugging in music 24/7. Try to focus the essay a little bit more on some more overarching aspects of your personality and using some of these examples as support.

Yes, your personality definitely shows through :)
But also, it does sound a little jumpy; try transitioning from one idea to another or combine similar ideas.

Looks good. Maybe fewer exclamation marks? I get that you're excited (hell, I will be too if I get into Stanford) but I think it comes off a little cheesy at times. Also, like has already been said, specifics would be nice.. For example, what kind of music do you listen to? Your personality definitely shows through though, so no worries there (:

I think you are a lively person. Your self explanation is good but sems a little jumpy.