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'no longer being the baby' - UC prompt #1



emicha25 3 / 5  
Nov 22, 2011   #1
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

The thought of no longer being the baby, no longer being the sole object of my mother's affection was heart wrenching and incredibly intimidating. I was too concerned with my own feelings that I never stopped to think of the wonderful experiences I would have with this new baby girl. Thinking about the baby that would soon steal my mother's attention filled me, instead, with jealousy. When the day her reign of attention-stealing would begin, I was absolutely loathing the thought of meeting her. Walking into the room I was prepared to completely despise her and I reluctantly approached the crib. At first glance I surprised myself by falling in love with her, from her round pink cheeks to her flailing little arms.

Over the years I fulfilled the role of the big sister perfectly. She was my real-life doll, I helped feed her, bathe her, and spent endless hours playing with her-although I drew the line at diaper duty. As she began to grow and smile and her eyes lit up when I came in and lifted her, my love grew. Watching the carefree life of a toddler and being there to experience her adventures was incredible. I idolized her ability to block out all sense of judgment while she talked to her imaginary friends and strangers as she strolled down the neighborhood.

I was able to see the world through her eyes; one full of adventure and possibilities. Growing with her made me more open-minded in the sense of having a more optimistic outlook on life. I no longer saw only the negatives but began to see the positives of situations. My world soon became part of what she saw through her eyes. I no longer was this uptight little girl who preferred to stay within her own boundaries and her own little bubble, I learned to have more fun and enjoy life the way my toddler would.

I see my world and my surroundings in a new light thanks to my half-sister. Not only did she change my world but she also affected my aspirations and dreams. I enjoy her company so much and enjoy playing a role in a child's life that I now want to work with children in whatever profession I choose. The experiences I have had at home and at a childcare I volunteer for have pushed me towards working with kids. I like to believe that the birth of my baby half-sister and watching her grow up and continue to grow has led to me having a bigger outlook on life and a better grasp on my dreams.

I'm not sure if I'm answering the prompt correctly. Any feedback will be appreciated, thanks!

_alan25 2 / 15  
Nov 22, 2011   #2
Overall the essay is good although it does seem a bit off topic, you can try changing a few things.

Not only did she change my world but she also affected my aspirations and dreams. I enjoy her company so much and enjoy playing a role in a child's life that I now want to work with children in whatever profession I choose. The experiences I have had at home and at a childcare I volunteer for have pushed me towards working with kids.

This, I believe, is your prompt. If you can add to it and include deeper insight on the importance of your dreams and aspirations I think the essay will come full circle.

Also, try mentioning the effects your sister had at home after she was born (the world you come from- your family/home). I really hope this helps you.


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