Please be harsh and tell me what you think.
I have 350 words, What can I cut out?
Write a brief essay (250 words maximum each question) in which you respond to the following questions. (Freshman applicants only):
1.Johns Hopkins offers 50 majors across the schools of Arts and Sciences and Engineering. On this application, we ask you to identify one or two that you might like to pursue here. Why did you choose the way you did? If you are undecided, why didn't you choose? (If any past courses or academic experience influenced your decision, you may include them in your essay.)
I'm lying on my bamboo bed looking at the bright pink celling of my attic, reminding myself to paint it dark blue this weekend. I imagine what a different feeling it would give my room. A new, exciting bold look. My mind then drifts off to the future. I imagine myself in five, ten, fifteen years. Where am I? What am I doing? Am I happy? Am I proud of what I'm doing? Of what I am accomplishing? Am I married, a mother, still single? How many things have I checked off my "to do before I die" list? Have I got my pilot license yet? Been jet skiing, climbed mt. Kilimanjaro?
In moments like these I envision all sorts of possibilities. I'm in Malaysia, Brazil, Tanzania; working in a village hospital, volunteering at a women's clinic, spreading awareness of HIV/AIDS with a NGO. Somehow, there are always common elements to my visions. I end up imagining my self in a foreign country, (unfortunately still single), definitely happy and proud of what I'm accomplishing, working with underprivileged people. With an enthusiasm for traveling and yearn for experiencing diverse cultures first-hand, I picture myself in a local area, working with a NGO in a health-related mission.
Ever since I could remember, I wanted to go into the field of health. I was the head surgeon to my toy animals, the nurse to my brothers and the girl with the cutest first aid kit on camping trips. This is why I am pursuing a degree in public health. Reading about the internship with a local NGO whilst studying abroad in Cape Town made this course even more desirable. It is tailored to my every interest! Going to the US for the first time, living and studying in JHU, and working in South Africa will definitely allow me to experience new cultures. The top-notch education at JHU, new challenges, and growing collection of memories will add to my wealth of experiences. And as a bonus I can check off two more things from my "to do before I die" list: Live in the famous US whilst studying at the prestigious JHU, and working in South Africa.
I have 350 words, What can I cut out?
Write a brief essay (250 words maximum each question) in which you respond to the following questions. (Freshman applicants only):
1.Johns Hopkins offers 50 majors across the schools of Arts and Sciences and Engineering. On this application, we ask you to identify one or two that you might like to pursue here. Why did you choose the way you did? If you are undecided, why didn't you choose? (If any past courses or academic experience influenced your decision, you may include them in your essay.)
I'm lying on my bamboo bed looking at the bright pink celling of my attic, reminding myself to paint it dark blue this weekend. I imagine what a different feeling it would give my room. A new, exciting bold look. My mind then drifts off to the future. I imagine myself in five, ten, fifteen years. Where am I? What am I doing? Am I happy? Am I proud of what I'm doing? Of what I am accomplishing? Am I married, a mother, still single? How many things have I checked off my "to do before I die" list? Have I got my pilot license yet? Been jet skiing, climbed mt. Kilimanjaro?
In moments like these I envision all sorts of possibilities. I'm in Malaysia, Brazil, Tanzania; working in a village hospital, volunteering at a women's clinic, spreading awareness of HIV/AIDS with a NGO. Somehow, there are always common elements to my visions. I end up imagining my self in a foreign country, (unfortunately still single), definitely happy and proud of what I'm accomplishing, working with underprivileged people. With an enthusiasm for traveling and yearn for experiencing diverse cultures first-hand, I picture myself in a local area, working with a NGO in a health-related mission.
Ever since I could remember, I wanted to go into the field of health. I was the head surgeon to my toy animals, the nurse to my brothers and the girl with the cutest first aid kit on camping trips. This is why I am pursuing a degree in public health. Reading about the internship with a local NGO whilst studying abroad in Cape Town made this course even more desirable. It is tailored to my every interest! Going to the US for the first time, living and studying in JHU, and working in South Africa will definitely allow me to experience new cultures. The top-notch education at JHU, new challenges, and growing collection of memories will add to my wealth of experiences. And as a bonus I can check off two more things from my "to do before I die" list: Live in the famous US whilst studying at the prestigious JHU, and working in South Africa.