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"Matrix of inspiration and dream "- Why UChicago?



Paul Jo 6 / 28  
Sep 24, 2011   #1
Please read my essay and give me any feedback and suggestion. Please be harsh to me!

Respond to Question 1 by writing a paragraph or two.

Question 1. How does the University of Chicago, as you know it now, satisfy your desire for a particular kind of learning, community, and future? Please address with some specificity your own wishes and how they relate to UChicago.

I have always been seeking for a university that provides students with academically competitive environments and hands-on experience, and found out that UChicago is one of my perfect fits. Possessing intimate interest in economics and other fields related to it, such as economics-mathematics and political economics, I am resolute to apply for the university. Since UChicago has a great reputation among prestigious American colleges on the economics, I consider that it would be a rare and honorable opportunity for me to expand unlimited amount of knowledge with which I am concerned. At UChicago, my lifelong dream of pursuing further education of the subject will be realized in the academically demanding curricula and coursework. UChicago will present me with the challenge I need to obtain my ultimate objective of creating an economic union like EU, comprised of three Northeast Asian countries (Korea, Japan, and China), and becoming an economist.

In addition to excelling in the intellectual areas, I'm also a competent athlete. Enjoying Kendo, one of the most famous Japanese traditional martial arts, and squash, I gained the ability to view the world in different perspective that I would not have been able to have, had I merely been a student interested only in academic affairs. Participating in a variety of sports activities is to be emphasized as much as it does continuing my academic career. UChicago is best equipped with its renowned varsity sports, club sports, and intramural sports. Some of them, if not all, will satisfy my desire to remain not only as a scholarly person, but also as a proficient sportsman.

dumi 1 / 6795  
Sep 24, 2011   #2
I think it's well written, Inhoo Jo. You have answered the prompt clearly. While reading it I only found the following sentence is a bit too long and felt it would be more effective if you break it up to two. That's just a suggestion for you to consider;

Enjoying Kendo, one of the most famous Japanese traditional martial arts, and squash, I gained the ability to view the world in different perspective that I would not have been able to have, had I merely been a student interested only in academic affairs.
ArgonautAdmetus 1 / 1  
Sep 24, 2011   #3
Too many generalizations. What exactly makes you want to go there? There are many schools that are renowned for their economics and sports. Check out their class offerings (and sports) and tell them specifically which ones makes you want to attend.
alcy2793 2 / 2  
Sep 25, 2011   #4
Hey, I think you should mention about their Socratic method of teaching and The Core. It would show your interest in their education system.

Overall, it is good.
OP Paul Jo 6 / 28  
Sep 25, 2011   #5
Thank you so much for your suggestions!

I really think I should mention something unique about UChicago, and why did it attracted me.


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