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MENTOS AND COKE? CHILDHOOD STORIES :D Cornell Secondary Essay



tehfunkicookie 19 / 49  
Dec 27, 2011   #1
Hey guys. I realized that there was another essay for Cornell. I really like blowing up Diet Coke bottles so I decided to write this essay about Diet Coke reactions. I don't know if I answered the prompt but please comment and grade as hard as you like (:

I kind of went over the world limit so if there is any specifics that I can cut down, please do tell me =) (I'm about 30 words over)

PROMPT:
Describe your intellectual interests, their evolution, and what makes them exciting to you. Tell us how you will utilize the academic programs in the College of Arts and Sciences to further explore your interests, intended major, or field of study.

BOOM! Diet Coke soda bursting out and shooting sky high after I dropped some Fruit Mentos in the bottle. Excited, I decided to empty out the whole pack I had into the bottle. After about a few minutes of BOOMs! and ZZZZZs!, all I was left with was an empty Diet Coke bottle. At the age of 7, my interests in Chemistry began.

After doing several of these small experiments, I yearned to learn more about these Chemistry. I kept pondering about how such a small round candy could trigger such a massive explosion inside a large drinking bottle. As I transitioned into middle school, I began to realize the basics behind these reactions. Just barely scratching the surface about the mechanics behind chemical reactions, I learned that whenever two reactants reacted, a product would form. Also, I understood that chemical bonds were broken when the Fruit Mentos reacted with the Diet Coke Soda. I was extremely excited when I did more experiments that had BOOMs! and smoke; however, when the teacher told me that there was a lot more to reactions than just two objects mixing together, I knew there were deeper truths I could acquire in order to comprehend the Fruit Mentos and Diet Coke reaction.

As I moved into high school, I began to understand not only more about Chemistry but also the explanations behind my Fruit Mentos and Diet Coke reaction. After taking Chemistry Honors and IB Chemistry SL, I learned that when the Mentos comes into contact with the Diet Coke, a reaction causes the formation of foam at a rapid rate. The structure of the Mentos is the most significant cause of the eruption due to nucleation. By learning activation energy and the importance of surface area, I also figured out that increasing the surface area of a reaction will increase the rate of a reaction. When I did a reaction with Mint Mentos, there was a bigger explosion. The surface of the mint Mentos was covered with many small holes that drastically increased the surface area, thereby allowing CO2 bubbles to form. Also during the reaction with the Fruit Mentos and Diet Coke, bonds that were broken within the Diet Coke that helped propel the reaction were reformed. To top it off, the teacher said I could calculate morality and an actual amount left over by the reaction if I had exact amounts to start with. Being both astonished and thrilled at what I could with Chemistry, I knew, without a doubt, that I had developed my interest in Chemistry.

I am applying to the College of Arts and Sciences because of this strong craving to learn more about reactions between a variety of chemicals and how they can lead to a variety of products that can be used in a multiple ways such as for medicine. The academic program will be the catalyst that will initiate my engineering goals provide me with the excellent educational foundation and experience necessary to succeed. It will force me to think on a more professional levels and explore the different frontiers of Chemistry. The academic program will allow me to flourish both intellectually and personally and provide a solid foundation for my future studies and research.

MohammedAmr 1 / 1  
Dec 27, 2011   #2
Its good, but try to improve the first sentences to each paragraphs. Make them a bit more catchy. Im no expert but ya.
admission2012 - / 475  
Dec 27, 2011   #3
Hello,

I like the flow of your story as you describe your youth until now. However, if I were reading your application, I would first ask myself...If this applicant has done some many experiments on his or her own, why do they need Cornell? Nothing in your essay explains why Cornell. More specifically nothing states how you will take full advantage of the immense resources available to you at the School of Arts and Sciences. Try to personalize this essay with your desires and the offerings of the University. - AAO

Hope This Helps.
OP tehfunkicookie 19 / 49  
Dec 27, 2011   #4
Thanks guys! I'll work on it some more and publish it again to see what you guys think.


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