Describe the world you come from-for example, your family, communityor school- and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
This is only the first couple of paragraphs of my personal statement. Please tell me what you thimk? I dont know if I am on the wright track.
I come from Mexican born parents. They were forced to quit school at a very young age to start working in corn fields in order to help my grandparents. At the age of 17, they both decided to make the long, perilous journey to the land of opportunity, United States. They left all their family behind to come to a place where they had nobody, but provided copious amounts of opportunities. They arrived to the United States with only a few dollars in their pocket. While working to collect enough money to rent a house, they hopped from shelter to shelter. Jobs were difficult to come by, especially for two illegal immigrants that didn't speak a lick of English. Because they didn't have anyone to rely on, they didn't get a chance to continue their education. After a few years, they had a family of 4, I being the youngest.
Growing up, we lived in a small two bedroom apartment. I didn't have the fanciest clothing or the fastest bike in the neighborhood; I had what my parents were able to provide me with. Every morning, because my older sisters were gone to school and my parents to work, I woke myself up, fed myself, dressed myself, and walked all alone to elementary school. After school, the first priority was getting homework done before going outside to play with friends. People might say I was a weird child when it came to homework, because I was never forced or told to do my homework, I just did it. My dad always says to my sisters and I, translated to English, "We came to America in order for you guys to have better education, attend college to have a good career. This is something that in Mexico only the wealthy have the chance to do, but here, in the U.S., everyone is presented with equal opportunities". This motivated me to do well and excel in school.
This is only the first couple of paragraphs of my personal statement. Please tell me what you thimk? I dont know if I am on the wright track.
I come from Mexican born parents. They were forced to quit school at a very young age to start working in corn fields in order to help my grandparents. At the age of 17, they both decided to make the long, perilous journey to the land of opportunity, United States. They left all their family behind to come to a place where they had nobody, but provided copious amounts of opportunities. They arrived to the United States with only a few dollars in their pocket. While working to collect enough money to rent a house, they hopped from shelter to shelter. Jobs were difficult to come by, especially for two illegal immigrants that didn't speak a lick of English. Because they didn't have anyone to rely on, they didn't get a chance to continue their education. After a few years, they had a family of 4, I being the youngest.
Growing up, we lived in a small two bedroom apartment. I didn't have the fanciest clothing or the fastest bike in the neighborhood; I had what my parents were able to provide me with. Every morning, because my older sisters were gone to school and my parents to work, I woke myself up, fed myself, dressed myself, and walked all alone to elementary school. After school, the first priority was getting homework done before going outside to play with friends. People might say I was a weird child when it came to homework, because I was never forced or told to do my homework, I just did it. My dad always says to my sisters and I, translated to English, "We came to America in order for you guys to have better education, attend college to have a good career. This is something that in Mexico only the wealthy have the chance to do, but here, in the U.S., everyone is presented with equal opportunities". This motivated me to do well and excel in school.