Prompt: Topic of choice.
Please comment for suggestions/corrections for errors. Thank you in advance!
I've realized why my favorite ice cream is Mint Chocolate Chip. It's a blend of bold, rich chocolate infused into a tangy and bittersweet minty flavor which combine to provide a strong flavor that represents who I am. Yes, I am Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. Most people don't realize this but Mint Chocolate Chip is like a literary flaw. It's a contradiction between two different flavors that should not have become blended in the first place, but through some odd man's creative endeavor, they came together, and inevitably became one of the most known and beloved flavors of people all throughout the world. Don't get me wrong, some people I've come across in my life hate the taste or even just a whiff of smell of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. But to the people who love it, they cherish every bite of the bold, strong tangy flavor that knocks their taste buds out. Similarly, I'm a contradiction of two blended flavors that create my identity. When I was nine, I knew what I wanted. I planned out a map of my life and where I was to be by the time I was 10, 15, and 20. By ten years old, I was going to graduate fifth grade by receiving an award for best performance in my annual school play and a social studies award for being an outstanding historian. At fifteen, I would be a student in one of the specialized high schools in NYC and would be youngest person to become president of my school. Finally at twenty, an age that would leave me turning gray and old, I would be at Princeton or Harvard, earning straight A's and studying criminal justice for a career in the police force. At nine, I was fearless, naïve, and innocent. I thought I knew the course of life and thought that life only had happy endings. Funny, how life can take a turn, without any kind of notification or warning sign. Now at seventeen, I am still innocent and naïve, but I am fearful of heights, scary movies, and bed bugs. I look at life not as a pathway through a map, but more like a steppingstone to get up a staircase. I do not know who and what I will be when I'm 22, 27, or 32. I am more open to opportunities and experiences. I want to learn a wide range of topics, from art history and music composition to international diplomacy and Russian studies. I have less of a rigid sense of direction for my life. Now I look at life as a spontaneous adventure; wherever life takes me, I was meant to be there for a reason. I now know that there are less happy endings in life. I thought everyone I loved would never die, but that perfect mentality ceased when my grandfather passed away this past May. I thought I would have perfect vision and baby soft skin until I turned eighty, but now I wear contacts and slather on a thick layer of lotion to keep my hands from being flaky and dry during the winter months. Now I know that my life is a contradiction that has blended the mentality of two ages: nine and seventeen to create a clearer image of my identity. I am the perfect blend of my bold, nine year old innocence of excitement and perfection, where everything I touch becomes gold and of my present mature and optimistic, seventeen year old self, who believes that through determination and the right kind of attitude, I can go far and be a blessing to others. It's amazing how similar my life parallels to the combining flavor of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. I am the perfect contradiction of Mint Chocolate Chip Ice cream.
excellent essay! I absolutely love the mint chocolate chip icecream analogy, and yes, it is one of my favourites. Here are a few suggestions:
Most people don't realize this but Mint Chocolate Chip is like a literary flaw.- there's no need to mention "most people don't realise this.." Just put it forward because it your opinion, that the icecream is a flaw.
Also, I don't know if it just comes out smushed together on this website, but try separating out paragraphs so it's not all one big blurb.
Otherwise, awesome essay!
Good Luck!
I like the analogy!
However I think you need to organize your thoughts into paragraphs, if possible. I don't know if you just didn't format it well for the website, but if not, I agree with bluedolphinz. It needs to be separated into sections. :)
I'm sure once it's formatted, it'll be fantastic. The comparison is interesting and original! Good Luck!
At nine, I was fearless, naïve, and innocent
I think the transition from your dreams to reality should be more dramatic. You should edit this sentence to make it more interesting, maybe tell them how you feel about not being able to reach your goals. Other than that I really enjoyed reading your essay!
It'd be great if you could read mine (:
