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MIT: "this makes living worthwhile" (attribute of your personality)



jjenny9301 5 / 10  
Dec 31, 2010   #1
What attribute of your personality are you most proud of, and how has it impacted your life so far? This could be your creativity, effective leadership, sense of humor, integrity, or anything else you'd like to tell us about. (*) (200-250 words)

In the city of Irvine lives a community of affluent people who bathe in luxury and lavishness. Twenty minutes away in the city of Santa Ana gathers a crowd of needy, underprivileged people waiting in line to be provided the basic life necessities. Between this social division is me, a seventeen-year-old girl from a middle class family with a yearning desire to break the invisible wall separating the rich and poor.

Blessed with more than enough, I withhold the duty, the responsibility, and the burden to reach out to those in need. This Thanksgiving break, I joined with my church to make 300 bags of sack lunch to hand out. And every Sunday morning at seven 'clock, I visit the homeless with a trunk full of food, socks, and blankets. Though my service only temporarily benefits them, I find happiness in it. In sharing my compassion, my life becomes more meaningful and worthwhile.

dlanki - / 24  
Dec 31, 2010   #2
your essay is fine. I think it could be better if you could shorten the first paragraph and talk more about your giving and its influence on you.
Gracious10 3 / 13  
Dec 31, 2010   #3
I like how you expressed your philanthropy but you state that you lie in the middle between the elite and those in abject perdition but you only attempt to help the poor. Try to add how you also try to enlighten the rich. Thats just my humble opinion (btw please edit my yale supplement)
soli 2 / 2  
Dec 31, 2010   #4
It's a nice essay,but I think you should mention sharper "What attribute of your personality are you most proud of?" I mean talk about a part of you personality that has caused this activity.

****please read my essay!thanks.


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