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My mother is my greatest influence - Your Life and Why Essay



KrystalMauri 1 / -  
Oct 2, 2011   #1
It says that I need 500 words in this paper. I don't know if that's the minimum or maximum but the word count is 526. This is the essay prompt for Clark Atlanta University. Also, do we have a title? I had Mommy Dearest in mind, is that appropriate.

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"Life for me ain't been no crystal stair", this, being said by Langston Hughes, perfectly sums my mother up. Growing up in the 'ghetto', my mother has come a long way from being homeless to having her own business and being married with a happy family-also having a nice place to call home. Most people would say a fictional character or celebrity is their greatest influence, in contrast, my mother is. Being caring, goofy, and encouraging, my mother, in no doubt, has had the greatest impact on me.

My mother has to be the most caring person that I would ever know. Helping people out, even when they are at their lowest, my mother would bend her back to make someone's life easier. In her free time, which she rarely has, she is always willing to help the homeless since she have once been on that route before. We once held a blanket/clothes drive for the needy and, once we have reached our goal, donated it to Second Chance, a local shelter we were once in. Sometime last year, she, my aunt, uncle and cousin all went to donate blood platelets to cancer patients in honor of my grandmother, who passed away last year. My mother was not able to donate blood platelets due to her iron deficiency. Therefore, she tried her best to raise her iron level; later that month, she was able to donate. Like a lion to her cubs, my mother would make sure that we would never have a bad day, always have something to eat on our table, and never let anything happen to us. Because she is a considerate person, my mother would go as far as helping out her worst enemy, which I could not do, when they are at hard times no matter what their differences are.

Being the caring person that she is, she does her best to make someone's day brighter, even if her day is not too bright. To lighten up someone's mood, she would always try to crack a joke. One time, I was a bull ready to charge but I tried to hide it by trying to keep a smile on my face. My mother was able to tell that I was not in the best mood and told me a joke, which made me burst with laughter. She laughs (almost) everything off. For instance, if she trips and falls, she would simply laugh at herself and call herself clumsy. She is always smiling or laughing about something. Like my mother, I am also goofy, and I would like to thank her for that trait. Many people say that my mother and I are very much alike-I don't think this is true.

My mother is the person that, I think, everyone would be able to look up to. Being caring, goofy, and encouraging, she is the type of person that one could never get tired of. Even though her life is not a crystal stair, she never let anything bring her down. She keeps the faith no matter what the circumstances are. For that alone, my mother is my greatest influence.

parinaz - / 1  
Oct 2, 2011   #2
even if her day is not too bright

It is better to say: even if her day is not so bright.
I think your essay is so great, you influence me perfectly. I did not observe any special error in your essay, but I recommend you to use less comma. Your some sentences are long and make readers tired and confused.

Good luck,


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