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Mumbai's Jari Mari Road - Common App Essay



wireman 1 / -  
Jan 2, 2013   #1
Please let me know if this is good enough for Clark University or Ithaca College. Thank you guys.

Last year, I read a YouTube comment mentioning a place called Jari Mari road which was apparently an eighth of a kilometer from Runway 27 of Mumbai Airport. I knew I had to go there to satisfy my voracious craving to watch airplanes.

Getting to Jari Mari meant maneuvering through crowded by-lanes crammed with goats. Amidst the careful, cautious steering I saw a mighty 747 taking off, attitude fifteen degrees, landing gear retracted, flying absolutely straight. Completely free in the skies, the plane's route was perfectly antithetical to my route to Jari Mari Road. But right then, I didn't see just the contrast. Being a pessimist, I saw myself, a quotidian sufferer of hardships.

Three minutes later, the rickshaw-wala declared that we had arrived. I got out to find myself standing not on a busy road with the hustling Mumbai traffic, but on the outskirts of the Jari Mari slum. I could hear the whining of massive Rolls Royce engines but the roofs of clustered shanties blocked my view. I then asked a passer-by a good vantage point for airplane viewing and he pointed out a tapered lane that went through one of the slums. A large public dustbin and the surrounding garbage, that emanated a stench which certainly irked my olfactory senses, clogged the entrance to the lane. I was hesitant about going in there and considered looking for alternative vantage points; but the man seemed affirmative when he told me that this was the best. However, I, being my natural escapist self, strongly felt that the opportunity costs of going through that lane were very high compared to going to an alternative vantage point.

I still don't know if it was one of the slight cracks in the walls of the slum through which I could faintly see an airplane that compelled me to take a closer look or if it was just a sudden urge to rethink my initial decision, but I suddenly had to get rid of that mental block. I had to wade through the garbage... And I did. It felt absolutely amazing. I would go on to cherish the succeeding views and events for the rest of my life. The humbling dust-bin incident was a testament to my escapist approach to life, but concomitantly also served as a significant learning experience. It taught me to face difficult situations head-on.

As I walked through the lane, I was filled with equal amounts of excitement and trepidation, the excitement of finally achieving what I have always wanted to, and trepidation because I was now in unvisited territory with locals staring right through me. But that didn't deter me. As I was walking, my attention shifted from my efforts to not look suspicious to the eight-year-olds spinning tops. I became slightly nostalgic, recollecting the way my life used to be before I purchased my computer. I perceived a sense of freedom in their eyes, a feeling that the technological world has completely robbed from me.

I then shifted my focus to the crack in the wall and kept walking until I finally had to bend down to see the planes take off. Much to my glee, I was witnessing an unbelievable sight: a Boeing 777 taxiing for take-off. As I turned to take out my camera, my heart stopped beating. On my right was a public toilet with a raised platform, where three men had a completely unobstructed view of the Mumbai Airport in all its glory. I could not believe that I had not seen it before now! I quickly hopped on to the platform and there it was. I could feel my eyes gleaming as they reflected hundreds of beautiful aircrafts. But, it wasn't just my eyes that were gleaming. The three men stared into the airport with aspirational eyes, the same eyes which were bogged down by the stoned wall and the barbed wire that served as sadistic impediments to the men's ambitions. I guess it wasn't just me who had all the hardships.

After watching planes for about an hour, I got down from the platform, hired a rickshaw and returned home. The elation and satisfaction of having witnessed something absolutely mind-blowing was subtly superseded by the humbling learning experience that my trip to Jari Mari had to offer.

katev 18 / 111  
Jan 2, 2013   #2
voracious craving to watch airplanes.

voracious craving doesn't really make sense. Is it just to watch airplanes? If anything, "my voracious watching of airplanes"

Being a pessimist, I saw myself, a quotidian sufferer of hardships.

Eeek... not sure you should say this. It's a little too harsh

subtly superseded by the humbling learning experience

I don't think "subtly superseded" sounds natural, it's a little too forced

You tell a very good story, I like your narrative. Just make sure you present yourself in a good light, you want to reveal your personality without saying you are a "quotidian sufferer of hardships"


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