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The one who can be depended on -UC Prompt 2


yeee707 1 / -  
Sep 12, 2009   #1
Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?"

When I was a child, my family went on vacations to various places around the world. When I was six years old, my family went on a vacation to Hawaii for the summer. We stayed at a hotel with a pool, in which we went swimming in.

The pool was fifty feet long, and, being competitive, my parents decided to have a race across the pool. They took off, leaving my brother, who was just a year old, and me sitting on the edge of the pool watching them as they raced. My brother was jumping up and down in excitement. Suddenly, he jumped into the water, and started to scream.

Although I knew not how to swim, I jumped into the pool without a second thought. I knew I had to do something, but all I could do was hold onto him as the water enveloped us. I screamed for my parents to come help, but they were tired, and the pool was long. After what seemed like many minutes, they finally pulled us out of the water.

No one was hurt, but the experience made me realize how much I loved my family and that I would do anything to help them. At six years old, jumping into a pool without any swimming experience was a near death experience to me. Yet I still did it to save my brother, even though I could not do much. The event has strengthened me greatly. For one, I took swimming lessons to avoid the possibility of entering a pool without knowing how to swim. I also learned to take great pride in what I would do for the people I love. I was the shy, small child at school, but at home, I was the eldest brother who would do anything for his family, the one my family could depend on.

The event helped make me more confident in myself, knowing that I can take risks to help others. For my parents, I study and get good grades in school. For my brother, I am a role model and mentor. For my friends, I am the calm, nice, helpful friend. And for me, I always say, "I can do it!"

Please read, and comment.
Llamapoop123 7 / 442  
Sep 12, 2009   #2
When I was a child, my family went on vacations to various places around the world. When I was six years old, my family went on a vacation to Hawaii for the summer.

We stayed at a hotel with a pool, in which we went swimming in.

^This sounds rather silly.

Though the experience is fitting, it happened when you were six. I guess it doesn't matter too much though.
EF_Simone 2 / 1,986  
Sep 16, 2009   #3
I, too, am uncertain about the degree to which this story is appropriate. You were so very young! I'm not sure what this says about your current personality. Have you consistently behaved in this way? If so, why not follow up with a more recent story?
tkkt1 11 / 47  
Sep 16, 2009   #4
This story happened when you were 6 which was too long ago to be relevant. You should provide more examples to show that you still have this characteristic. Good luck!


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