Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width   Posts: 2


A one-way Road; I try to recall every second of my past journey and its eccentricities



orian2014 3 / 3  
Dec 10, 2014   #1
Prompt: Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?

"It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end."
― Ernest Hemingway

Four days of intermittent walking and I somehow reached an incomparable state of bliss and pleasure in the midst of all the blisters and suffering. Whether what made the peregrination so exquisite was the sense of importance I felt whenever I provided others with what I considered to be viable advice or perhaps the invaluable hours I spent familiarizing myself, nevertheless what generated me such an aura of content will eternally be a mystery. Uncountable were the particularities of said journey that pinpointing a specific reason to the enchanting atmosphere would mean decomposing the whole of the scenery.

Regardless of the fact that I don't consider the landscape to be the core reason as to why I felt so alleviated during the peregrination, there is no denying the ceaseless beauty of the trails. Whether the days were obscure or radiant was impossible to tell thanks to the roof of greenery that towered over our heads intermittently, minute rays of sunlight seeping their way through the canopy as the wind shook the leaves that sheltered us. As I strolled on the unpaved roads in the midst of the country, the dirt of the lanes oozed its way into my shoes and stuck to the back of my throat. My ears were filled with nature's harmonious sounds, the occasional rosary being prayed, and more often than not, the playing of a guitar with the voices of those who traveled beside me joining the choir. Infants, adolescents, mothers, fathers, grandparents, ex-rehabbers, ex-convicts, nuns, priests, we walked together and shared the same sporadic emotions, we came together in prayer and cared for one another when in suffering.

As a child I was told that out of the deep depths of misfortune comes bliss. These were words I had never come to comprehend until my walk to San Nicolas. The misfortunes I had to undergo during my journey, the fatigue, the pain, the thirst, the weather, all culminated in an exquisite feeling of satisfaction and pride that were the motivation that kept me going. Some of the pleasure, for instance, came from the perpetual atmospheric feel of companionship that indulged me endlessly and lead me to believe I was part of something otherworldly. As we peregrinated, many anecdotes were swapped and several words of advice and wisdom were bartered amongst us. I remember vividly the emotion of gratification that would sure through me whenever I delivered any set of advice that my companion described as helpful. The mere belief that my words might have provided guidance to another individual filled me with contempt. In my family I am known as 'the wise child', the adviser of most, and fulfilling that same purpose in another environment was an immense delight.

Coming to know who I was, my faults as well as my assets, also contributed to the perfection of the journey. I had several moments of solitude in which I came to understand how others saw me and how I saw myself as well. I uncovered my adventurous personality, the constant inclination I have towards experiencing new escapades. I came to terms with my denial towards situations I consider unjust. It was during this journey when I truly found myself. After seventeen years, I came to know myself in the most profound way possible.

I count the days until the 21st of September, when the peregrination starts. Whenever my day is going south, I try to recall every second of my past journey and its eccentricities. I remember serving water and the grateful expressions; I remember carelessly screaming out of the top of my lungs the pious lyrics whenever a guitar was playing. And so I retain, these invaluable memories that have penetrated themselves into my heart, casting everlasting happiness upon their remembrance.

vangiespen - / 4077  
Dec 10, 2014   #2
De Angelis, you really have a serious problem in understanding your common essay prompts. You are always deviating from the prompt requirements and this essay is no exception to that trend that you have set. 4 days of experience? Nope. That is not what the essay is asking you to explain or narrate. You simply had to choose a place. Say, your bedroom. Then explain why you feel most content there. Maybe you feel content there because it is your private world where you can to anything you wish without any prying eyes upon you. Maybe you feel comfortable in the shower where you can get lost in your own thoughts as the water trickles down upon you from the shower head. For an environment, you could discuss a sense of contentment probably overcomes you as you sit in your backyard doodling away on your sketchpad, lost in the imaginary world where your dreams come true.Or the public library where you are with other people, quietly reading and contemplating the meaning of the written words as they apply to your life. Maybe the environment of a chapel or community charitable affair where you find contentment in serving others. Why do you feel content when serving others?

These are examples of places, environments, and reasons why you can find contentment in these areas. It does not have to be a 4 day long trek to a place that nobody understands. You would need to explain what that ritual is all about and why it gives you a sense of contentment to participate in such an environment. Revise your essay to reflect something similar. This essay does not accomplish the task dictated by the prompt requirement.


Home / Undergraduate / A one-way Road; I try to recall every second of my past journey and its eccentricities
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳