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There's a sense of calmness in the air. For the moment, it's just me and several lifeless bodies on the cremation platforms by the banks of the holy river Bagmati. Some of them are in the middle of cremation, while some are being prepared for it. For many an open cremation could be a repelling sight, but to me, it's the scene I've been a part of for very long, way too long to even remember since when. I'm familiar with every aspect of this place, maybe too familiar, such that every time I enter this cremation site, a sense of belonging fills my heart and I feel content.
A mix of disparate smells ranging from the smell of sweet incense to the smell of the bodies being cremated encapsulates me. There's a hustle of activities going on around me but those activities don't seem to matter anymore. The sound of the footsteps of hundreds of people walking on the stone pavements, of vendors shouting to sell their goods and of people chattering; all seems to fade away along with the smoke that seems to disappear somewhere. All I hear is the soothing sound of bells ringing in a rhythm and of conches calming every nerve in my body. All I see now is the Hindu death ritualistic practice being performed by the priest for the cremation. I look at the son control all his emotions as he puts the fire in the mouth of the deceased. Then the priest puts more piles of wood on the top and after a while the scene is just an ablaze of fire and I can see the fire burning with all its intensity in the river. The act of lighting the fire for the cremation by a family member seems bold to me. I feel my mind being empty of all the worldly troubles as I gaze into the fire.
As I stand across the river I can't help but look at the magnificent temple of Pashupatinath above the cremation area. The temple where this cremation site is located is home for lost and troubled souls. For the moment I'm one of them. As I breathe in the smell of various lives that reside here at the temple, a wave of nostalgia fills my heart and my thoughts go back to all the early mornings I came here on my birthday, countless weddings that happened here and the precious moments I got to spend with my dear ones for the very last time. The grandeur of this place welcomes me and all the feelings of insecurities and worries disappear. My troubles get lost in the splendor of this place as I get lost in the lull of the moment temporarily.
As I walk amongst the holy crowd chanting mantras, I envision the extremity of devotion that surrounds me. I see it in the eyes of an elderly worn and torn by life who has come to visit the temple one last time. I see hope in the face of a beggar every time a visitor passes by him and how he is still able to maintain that indelible smile on his face. Watching this warms my heart and I feel the emotions stir up within me. Amidst the chaos of life, the temple gives me a space of my own where I can think freely. I see faith in everyone here .Every time I visit the place, I gain faith; faith in myself, faith in people around me and simply faith in life.
On my way back I see the holy sadhus. Covered in ashes from their head to toe, these devout men smile at me their heavenly smile, I smile back feeling content.
There's a sense of calmness in the air. For the moment, it's just me and several lifeless bodies on the cremation platforms by the banks of the holy river Bagmati. Some of them are in the middle of cremation, while some are being prepared for it. For many an open cremation could be a repelling sight, but to me, it's the scene I've been a part of for very long, way too long to even remember since when. I'm familiar with every aspect of this place, maybe too familiar, such that every time I enter this cremation site, a sense of belonging fills my heart and I feel content.
A mix of disparate smells ranging from the smell of sweet incense to the smell of the bodies being cremated encapsulates me. There's a hustle of activities going on around me but those activities don't seem to matter anymore. The sound of the footsteps of hundreds of people walking on the stone pavements, of vendors shouting to sell their goods and of people chattering; all seems to fade away along with the smoke that seems to disappear somewhere. All I hear is the soothing sound of bells ringing in a rhythm and of conches calming every nerve in my body. All I see now is the Hindu death ritualistic practice being performed by the priest for the cremation. I look at the son control all his emotions as he puts the fire in the mouth of the deceased. Then the priest puts more piles of wood on the top and after a while the scene is just an ablaze of fire and I can see the fire burning with all its intensity in the river. The act of lighting the fire for the cremation by a family member seems bold to me. I feel my mind being empty of all the worldly troubles as I gaze into the fire.
As I stand across the river I can't help but look at the magnificent temple of Pashupatinath above the cremation area. The temple where this cremation site is located is home for lost and troubled souls. For the moment I'm one of them. As I breathe in the smell of various lives that reside here at the temple, a wave of nostalgia fills my heart and my thoughts go back to all the early mornings I came here on my birthday, countless weddings that happened here and the precious moments I got to spend with my dear ones for the very last time. The grandeur of this place welcomes me and all the feelings of insecurities and worries disappear. My troubles get lost in the splendor of this place as I get lost in the lull of the moment temporarily.
As I walk amongst the holy crowd chanting mantras, I envision the extremity of devotion that surrounds me. I see it in the eyes of an elderly worn and torn by life who has come to visit the temple one last time. I see hope in the face of a beggar every time a visitor passes by him and how he is still able to maintain that indelible smile on his face. Watching this warms my heart and I feel the emotions stir up within me. Amidst the chaos of life, the temple gives me a space of my own where I can think freely. I see faith in everyone here .Every time I visit the place, I gain faith; faith in myself, faith in people around me and simply faith in life.
On my way back I see the holy sadhus. Covered in ashes from their head to toe, these devout men smile at me their heavenly smile, I smile back feeling content.
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