So i'm just having a lot of trouble writing an essay, I don't know why it's so hard! I thought it would be easy, but it's not and I only have two weeks for this application. PLEASE HELP!! I don't even know if I like this one, I just tried it out. I've also written like two other ones and I didn't like them either. I don't even know where to begin or how to do it! Ugh!!
Prompt: As Georgetown is a diverse community, the Admissions Committee would like to know more about you in your own words. Please submit a brief essay, either personal or creative, which you feel best describes you.
Sometimes, I am a adventurer, a pirate ready to explore the seven seas. I am curious. The world is absolutely fascinating. I gawk wide eyed at unfamiliar cultures. They are different, they are beautiful, they are breathtaking. New sights, new languages inspire me. I not only wish to explore my own Mexican and Filipino heritages, but every other one; I wish to experience every odd aspect of the world that I can. I hunger for the knowledge, the knowledge of the past, the future, and the present. There is so much wonder, but also so much horror that I have yet to discover.
Sometimes I am Superwomen. I protect the world from notorious criminals. I soar over fluffy clouds and baby blue skies; I am strong. I am determined and I do not give up even if something seems entirely difficult or unachievable. I fight. I fight to achieve those impossible dreams, and I will always fight. I will fight until I can say that I have truly "lived." I will fight until I have contributed to the world, until I have made a difference: whether that difference is protecting our people or helping out someone in need.
Sometimes, I am my own student. If something interests me, I decide to teach it to myself. I can learn anything. When I was in 7th grade I took it upon myself to learn to play the piano and to learn how to speak a new language each year. I'm not an amazing soloist nor am I completely fluent in many languages, but I can read notes well enough to play songs and can say "Hello, my name is..." in 5 different languages. And once I am given the chance, the resources, and the education, I will take full and complete advantage of them. I can do anything with independence and education.
Sometimes, I am a singer, I am a dancer, even though I have no idea how to sing or dance. But I feel it, I feel the rhythm fill my soul. I feel like shouting songs obnoxiously down the street as I trip ungracefully. I feel like twirling an umbrella and singing in the rain I feel like smiling. And I feel simply, entirely blissful while doing it.
Sometimes, I am a mouse. I am mild, and scared. I scurry aimlessly in a maze. Everywhere I turn, high, white, menacing walls surround me. But I am clever, and I know that I will discover the exit.
Sometimes, I just don't know.
But always, I am a dreamer. I rest on a cotton cloud, basking in the golden and warm sun. I dream the impossible, except to me, it is not impossible. To me, the barrier between concrete reality intangible dreams does not exist. Instead, they coexist in a fantastic new world. A world not smothered by a cloak of dullness. A world that is bright and dazzling. A world that smiles, sings, dances, and invites me to do the same, invites me to take advantage of everything it offers.
And always, I am me.
I think this is really a great essay, and I have to admit I'm personally very fond of this particular format.
Small edits:
I would consider placing "sailor" rather than "pirate" - sailor give you same adventuring idea minus pillaging connotations
About discovering horror - maybe you can connect this to the superwoman aspect? As in, you aren't just discovering it, you're going to do something about it.
I think the superwoman image is good, but the statement "I protect the world from notorious criminals" is a bit much. Are you really doing/planning on doing that? If so, give an example. More likely, you aren't literally doing that. Take that out and focus more on the strength and making a difference aspect.
I really like the "I am my own student" paragraph, since it shows intellectual curiosity and taking advantage of opportunities.
I'm not so sure about the singer and dancer paragraph. The words that stand out are "obnoxiously" and "ungracefully." While this is probably true (I know I'm guilty of it) do you really want those ideas to stand out?
But overall, I think it gives a really good idea of who you are a person, particularly highlighting a desire for service, curiosity, creativity, and confidence.
Thanks so much for your feedback!
I will definitely change the pirate thing, I hadn't thought of that and it is a great point!
The superwoman thing was more something I imagine myself doing or dream about doing, not something I actually do. I don't won't that that to be misunderstood and come off as arrogant, thinking that I'm so awesome that I save the world or something. I will try to clarify that and connect it to the horrors. :)
And I'll try to fix or just delete the dancer paragraph (any other suggestions how to fix?)
Anyways thanks so much for your input!! It's really helpful and I'm glad it gave some sense of who I am. :D
