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My painting performance - applying to college



loreal 3 / 5  
Oct 28, 2012   #1
RIGHT now im applying to colleges so i need help with my essay, please be as harsh as you can but i need i really need help.

Q. Discuss your activities during the last several years (for example; school organizations, the arts, individual interests and etc)

Since my childhood I have always looked forward to attending school. My desire to gain knowledge was, of course, the priority, but extracurricular classes fascinated me the most. I had always been a sports freak, in middle school I was the captain of the basketball team and outside of school I usually played badminton and cricket. Going to high school in NY was a thrill. Everything was different but as soon as I felt comfortable with the environment, I decided to join soccer; a new sport that I happened to love it.

Painting; it is more than just a hobby, it is my identity. I started to paint as it was an activity that could be confined four walls of a room. However, every time I paint, my eyes are opened to a new perspective of the world. As I delve into various subjects pertaining to the world, I recognize that I am missing out on being a part of it. In the past couple of years painting improved my patience, perseverance, and strives for perfection; but above all it led me to think with an open mind.

Writing has been a difficult task for me. I mean in four years of moving to United States, how well can a person actually write? But sometimes obstacles in life makes a person learn new things about themselves, just like I did. Junior Year in High School, my dad decided to move back to our country leaving me and my family behind. I went in depression but at the same time I developed my extreme interest in writing poems. I often found myself writing short poems about things I found amusing around me. Slowly my poems started taking shape into a new interest of writing songs. After I had a few songs written, it led my interest of learning an instrument; I decided piano that I happened to learn quite fast.

Sophomore year was when I started to become familiar with volunteer work. It was my math teacher Mr. Sullivan, who asked me to help him peer tutor his students after school. From that day on, I took my first steps as a peer tutor in other subjects like Science, Social Studies and even Art. I started as a small volunteer in school, but in the middle of junior year I began to work as a volunteer for Rockland Family Shelter. My job was to look after kids and plays games or creative activities together. I initially decided children are my area of interest when choosing this volunteer work because I love children and always take pleasure spending time with them.

Being new to United States, I tried my best to keep myself involved in and outside of school and will never forget the obstacles I had to overcome to reach my goal. I know that this passion of mine as a volunteer and sports will continue to grow as I go to Penn State and will push me to play intramurals.

EF_Susan - / 2310  
Nov 8, 2012   #2
My desire to gain knowledge was, ---No comma here---of course, ---or here.-- the priority, but extracurricular classes fascinated me the most.

Everything was different, but as soon as I felt comfortable in the environment, I decided to join soccer; a new sport that I happened to love. it.

I started to paint, as it was an activity that could be confined to four walls of a room.

I mean in four years of moving toliving in the United States, how well can a person actually learn to write?

I went into depression but at the same time I developed my extreme interest in writing poems.

My job was to look after kids and plays games or do creative activities together.

I know that this passion of mine as a volunteer, and my participation in sports will continue to grow as I go to Penn State and will push me to play intramural.

:)


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