UF ADMISSIONS ESSAY:
Prompt: Describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the UF campus community. You may want to reflect on your family, your school or community activities, or your involvement in areas outside of school.
Please help me edit and correct any mistakes. Thanks!!!
There have been many influences and experiences throughout my 17 years of life that have affected the person I am today and more importantly, the person I strive to be in the future, but a most recent event involving my parents receiving Citizenship of the United States of America was particularly moving and inspirational to me.
To witness my parents taking the Oath of Allegiance and being sworn in as United States ...
... of America was particularly moving and inspirational to me. Please see my comments as to mechanical errors in your previous posting of this essay.
To witness my parents taking the Oath of Allegiance and being sworn in as United States Citizens gave me a deep sense of pride and was particularly important to me, as I became a United States Citizen that day also. My parents are originally from England and I was born in England, although I came to America as a baby. Until that day I did not understand the importance or relevance of becoming a United States Citizen , because I had spent all my life here and felt no different than my friends, but after having gone through the ceremony it instilled in me great pride and emotion and made me think about my future and what opportunities lay ahead for me, as long as I had the drive and ambition to take advantage of them. It also made me realize what sacrifices my parents had made in the hopes of making a better life here in America for my sister and I . It has not been an easy road for them, as they left behind their family and friends and have worked extremely hard to build up a business together, working long hours. Their business has proved to be particularly challenging during this downturn in the economy here in Florida, but they continue to work hard in the hopes of a turn around.
Together with my parents that memorable day of Citizenship were many other immigrants from all over the world being sworn in and it made me appreciate that each of them had a story to tell of sacrifices and hardships, some more than others, yet they all had one thing in common and that was that they all had hopes and desires of achieving their "American Dream". Unfortunately the "American Dream" is not something that is handed out on a silver platter as part of your Citizenship of America and not all who desire it will achieve it, but, I believe, after witnessing that event, it has provided me with the motivation and desire to strive for my full potential in my academic life in the hopes of achieving my "American Dream" and I feel that the University of Florida is the place where these traits will be important tools to build upon for my future success in javascript:paste_strinL(selektion,%209,%20'',%20' ',%20'')life. Please see my comments in regards to this piece from the previous post.
I look forward to making my parents very proud of my achievements and to realize that their sacrifices were worth it to see me achieve the honour of acceptance into the University of Florida."
