Sculptor Jacques Lipchitz once said, "Cubism is like standing at a certain point on a mountain and looking around. If you go higher, things will look different; if you go lower, again they will look different. It is a point of view." With this in mind, describe a moment when your perspective changed.2000 characters
Since June 30, 1997, the world has been divided into two equal and opposing Newtonian crusaders: those who love Harry Potter and those who don't. There are people whose eyes light up, mouth drools and spirits lift at the very mention of the beauty, and then there are those cynics who believe that this series is the sole reason for psychedelic-advancement and mental putrefaction, heresy, and "Magick Moste Evile" (written by Godelot; imparts depravity about the Darkest magic). The evening I finished reading the last sentence in the last chapter in the last Harry Potter book ("All was well."), with tears streaming down my cheeks, when a batch-mate piped, "How on earth can you stand that?" I stared at her, and I realized that after reading this, I would never be the same person. I had changed, and Potter did it.
Formerly I was a devoted believer in the singularity of psyches. Everyone wants to be loved, everyone wants peace, and everyone wants to be rich/famous/brilliant/unopposed/an overall achiever. However, my friend's impulsive statement made me rethink. Are all people really the same? Does everyone really have the same dreams and ambitions? Doesn't everyone work for nothing more than having means of getting to everlasting happiness? Harry Potter, and the impulsiveness of my friend's comment made me wonder. Apparently life is about a lot more than being "happy" or "successful" or "rich". It is about the psyche we choose for ourselves. As Sirius says so beautifully, "...the world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters. We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are."
I am worried that it's too generic, or maybe that it doesn't answer the question. Please help! Thank you (in advance!)
Good Day Shubhangi,
There was a lot going on in your essay. A lot of quotes. Maybe this is just me, but I am not quite sure what your original perspective was and what changed about it and I am not sure how Harry Potter ties into it either. I do not think this is generic, and I think with some improvements and some changes that you can have a really good essay.
Hope this helps!
Thanks a lot Zhoe! I'll post a revised version as soon as I can, and would be grateful if you could review that as well. You really cleared a lot of doubts (and confirmed several suspicions I had regarding this essay) :)
No problem & I will. I would love if you could help me out as well by reading my own revised version. Thanks!
Hey, I truly enjoyed reading your essay. Having said that, I would like to point out some stuff. Forgive me for being a little harsh. I'd say that you used too many characters on the first half of your essay. While you're given 200 characters, which becomes approx. 350 words, you've used around 170 of it to just introduce your topic. I'd say it's better to describe that moment, what's going on in your head, and then talk about the moments after that moment itself. Narrate, make it vivid, but most of all, make it personally significant. They don't really care about how others see Harry Potter (I'm a fan too), but they want to see how you see Harry Potter, and I think you take too much time describing other people. I hope these suggestions help, and I hope they're in time xD.
Help me too please!
I just want to mention that I once heard from an AO that students should better not write things about Harry Potter or Twilight because there are toooooooo many people writing it.
Anyway, I think your idea is really great.
Wow I really didn't expect so much feedback! Thank you guys; this has been invaluable :)
