Psychology journey - statement of purpose for UGRAD

Growing up as the eldest daughter in a middle-class family and the first grandchild, I always felt the pressure to meet the expectations placed on me, especially to pursue a career in medicine. For a long time, I thought this was my path. However, during my higher secondary education, I discovered my passion for psychology. I realized that I genuinely enjoy listening to people, understanding their struggles, and helping them find solutions. This led me to decide against registering for the MD CAT and instead explore the fascinating world of psychology.
Last year during Ramadan, I had the opportunity to engage in community service by organizing a donation campaign at my college. I went door-to-door in my neighborhood to collect funds, which allowed me to provide grocery bags and treats to five needy families. This experience was incredibly fulfilling and reinforced my belief in the importance of empathy and connection.
In terms of leadership, I served as house captain in my matriculation year and was a class representative from grades 3 to 8. I genuinely love working in group projects because I believe that collaboration not only makes tasks easier but also brings together diverse ideas and perspectives. Helping others is something I value deeply, and I enjoy guiding my peers to achieve our goals together.
I am excited about the prospect of studying in the U.S. because I believe it will allow me to interact with people from different cultures. This experience will not only help me grow personally and professionally but also enhance my ability to conduct research across cultures. By understanding the beliefs and values of individuals from diverse backgrounds, I can deepen my insights into psychological practices and contribute to the field in meaningful ways. It would truly be a dream come true to embark on this journey.

The approach to the statement of purpose is too simple. There needs to be more depth to the personal, academic, and social reasons that you wish to spend a semester studying in the US. While I can understand that you were motivated to look into the fields of medicine by your family, there needs to be a more marked reason within the family for you to want to shift from a medical MD to a doctor of psychology. The reasons you state are not really convincing enough from what I can read. The essay itself is too shallow in presentation and not really well connected in terms of discussion. You need to better connect the points using transition sentences or phrases.