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'Reading masterpieces' - umich supplement essey communities



nalatieer 1 / 3  
Nov 25, 2012   #1
Hello! I'm new here~
Please help me with this essay below, I'm not sure whether I answer the prompt, and since I'm not a native speaker, I will need help with grammar and misspelling too:

Everyone belongs to many different communities and/or groups defined by (among other things) shared geography, religion, ethnicity, income, cuisine, interest, race, ideology, or intellectual heritage. Choose one of the communities to which you belong, and describe that community and your place within it. (Approximately 250 words)

I am the hacker whose life is extended to the cyberspace and discovered a world far more colorful than normal; I am the casual observer gazing into the starry sky who believes that humanity is not alone in the universe. My identification is changing as I flipping through the pages.

In Ender's Game, the alien Bugger forgives humanity for nearly driving her colony to distinction; Savage from Brave New World asks us what the limitations of civilization are; while in Fahrenheit 451, a world where books are banned and burnt, Montag bursts into tears for the beauty of a poem. I was constructing brand new worlds one after another inside my head when I read through the lines.

Proudly, I am the unusual girl who can be defined as a science fiction geek. Reading these masterpieces are important moments in my life, they give me the courage and imagination I need to think critically on a grander scale. This is a realm without the restriction of individual and country differences. Combining imagination with sound scientific and technical details, science fiction helps me fall in love with the enormity of space, the intricate microscopic world and let me contemplate the future of mankind. I have no fear for the future-utopian future gives me hope while apocalyptic scenes let me ponder on the problems in the real world. When I participate in forum discussion and gain new insights, help translate great new novels into Chinese and share with others, I become calm and content.

It is not just power of words that make me calm. It is the power of the future.
Any help is appreciated!
It is urgent,Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!

Birdiee 6 / 26  
Nov 25, 2012   #2
Nicely written, but I think you need to elaborate more on your place in that community. You do a little bit when you say

When I participate in forum discussion and gain new insights, help translate great new novels into Chinese and share with others,

but I think you need a bit more.


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