Hey guys, heres my common app essay. my writing isnt that great so i really need suggestions and helps for improvement. Also any comments if the overall idea is any good or not. thanks
I won't lie. Walking into Central, Singapore's premier fire station, as its youngest Section Commander was a terrifying experience. What was even more frightening? Then telling a group of veterans who have been tackling catastrophes for years and saying "hey guys! My name's (INSERT NAME HERE). I'll be leading you from now on".
However, my station experiences have affected me remarkably and one particular incident is indelibly imprinted in my mind. On a lazy Sunday morning, my crew and I were dispatched to an apartment block to investigate a call. When we arrived, we were dismayed to find a seventh story unit enveloped in flames with plumes of smoke ascending miles into the air. With an inoperable lift and deficient water pressure, we struggled to even get near the blaze let alone control it. Finally, I decided to use an extinguisher in an attempt to contain the fire. It was a foolhardy move and the burns on my left arm attest to that. However this action led me to save my first life.
When I entered the room it was not the blazing inferno or the falling debris that caught my attention but rather the large green shape plodding away from the fire. It was of all things, a tortoise. Not just any tortoise, but the largest, portliest and possibly greenest tortoise that I had ever laid eyes on. Gently, I picked him up and brought him away from any immediate peril and down to his grateful owner who tearfully thanked me.
I was neither recognized nor rewarded for my actions. But this incident above all others taught me that I needn't carry a damsel out of a burning building to be a hero. It was not my bravery or skills, but rather my genuine concern for his beloved pet, that touched the owner. Through my experiences as a firefighter, I am witness to both acts of munificence on a monumental level and displays of kindness on an individual basis. Do you want to know what I've learnt? They all matter. When I do finally hang up my fire helmet, my duty does not end. There will still be those, like that tortoise, who desperately need my help.
Due to this, I chose to pursue engineering as its potential for turning theoretical ideas into practical reality greatly attracts me. First responders are constantly bogged down by their obsolete and cumbersome equipment and advancements in technology can result in us being safer and more effective. Particularly, I'm interested in spearheading movements to create new types of breeching (a type of forward pump) as well as to involve myself in the innovative CAFS (compressed air foam system) which potentially could revolutionize firefighting. Even if I can't operationally be on the ground, I can still support and contribute to others' lives.
I would like to believe that right now that tortoise is somewhere lounging under the sun eating a juicy lettuce leaf, thanking the fireman who saved him.
I won't lie. Walking into Central, Singapore's premier fire station, as its youngest Section Commander was a terrifying experience. What was even more frightening? Then telling a group of veterans who have been tackling catastrophes for years and saying "hey guys! My name's (INSERT NAME HERE). I'll be leading you from now on".
However, my station experiences have affected me remarkably and one particular incident is indelibly imprinted in my mind. On a lazy Sunday morning, my crew and I were dispatched to an apartment block to investigate a call. When we arrived, we were dismayed to find a seventh story unit enveloped in flames with plumes of smoke ascending miles into the air. With an inoperable lift and deficient water pressure, we struggled to even get near the blaze let alone control it. Finally, I decided to use an extinguisher in an attempt to contain the fire. It was a foolhardy move and the burns on my left arm attest to that. However this action led me to save my first life.
When I entered the room it was not the blazing inferno or the falling debris that caught my attention but rather the large green shape plodding away from the fire. It was of all things, a tortoise. Not just any tortoise, but the largest, portliest and possibly greenest tortoise that I had ever laid eyes on. Gently, I picked him up and brought him away from any immediate peril and down to his grateful owner who tearfully thanked me.
I was neither recognized nor rewarded for my actions. But this incident above all others taught me that I needn't carry a damsel out of a burning building to be a hero. It was not my bravery or skills, but rather my genuine concern for his beloved pet, that touched the owner. Through my experiences as a firefighter, I am witness to both acts of munificence on a monumental level and displays of kindness on an individual basis. Do you want to know what I've learnt? They all matter. When I do finally hang up my fire helmet, my duty does not end. There will still be those, like that tortoise, who desperately need my help.
Due to this, I chose to pursue engineering as its potential for turning theoretical ideas into practical reality greatly attracts me. First responders are constantly bogged down by their obsolete and cumbersome equipment and advancements in technology can result in us being safer and more effective. Particularly, I'm interested in spearheading movements to create new types of breeching (a type of forward pump) as well as to involve myself in the innovative CAFS (compressed air foam system) which potentially could revolutionize firefighting. Even if I can't operationally be on the ground, I can still support and contribute to others' lives.
I would like to believe that right now that tortoise is somewhere lounging under the sun eating a juicy lettuce leaf, thanking the fireman who saved him.
