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"Relate a situation in your life where a personal sense of honor" - UMW Essay



aelee523 3 / 8  
Dec 12, 2010   #1
Relate an event or situation in your life where your personal sense of honor influenced you or guided your actions.

I walked towards the back of the room to begin taking the test that I had missed days before when I was out sick from school. The teacher handed me the test and as I scanned the front page a strong pang of guilt hit me. This was not a makeup test as I had planned on it being. It was the same test the rest of the class had taken. The guilt grew with each answer that I confidently circled. I was sure to get an A, wasn't it worth it? I finished in no time flat, sure of my work. I didn't want to seem like I finished too quickly though so I flipped from page to page, pretending to review my answers. After an appropriate amount of time had passed, I waked back to the front of the room, handed the test to my teacher, and took my seat to learn the day's lesson. As he flipped through the power point I could not get my off what I had just done. Was the A truly worth the guilt of cheating? It would assure me an A for the semester. How could I pass that up?

After class I knew what I had to do. Yes, I could easily get away with this. I could walk out of the room and come back the next day with bright red A drawn on the top of my paper, probably with a comment of good work, or great job. What I could not do however was live with the guilt. I lingered in the door way after the bell rang and wait for my peers to file out of the class room. "What can I help you with Elizabeth?" my teacher asked. Slowly I explained to him how I had gotten one of my friends test, thinking that the one I would be taking would be different, as they normally were. I explained to him that I thought this would be a great way of studying, cheating maybe, but no real guilt and no way of getting caught. As I listened to the words flow from my lips I could not believe I was having to explain something like this to anyone. This wasn't me. I don't cheat. I don't lie. How could I have broken my standards of honor for myself simply by being lazy? I was ashamed.

My teacher forgave me, thanked me for my honesty, and gave me a real makeup test to take. He told me I did the right thing but despite his reassurance, his comforts were hollow to me. I should have never had to tell him that. I should have never given up something that I pried so much in myself just to make my studying easier. It is a mistake that I never plan to make again and regardless of the threats of punishment. My own feeling of self-guilt will far out weight the consequences that I would have to face.

yaoiver 3 / 8  
Dec 15, 2010   #2
I think you have fulfilled the requirement of the essay.

In my opinion, what you need to do is to explain the confession(second paragraph) in more detail.
This would help in the flow of the essay.

What you have learnt from this lesson?

(I should have never had to tell him that)
This part I'm not sure what does "that" refers to.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Dec 22, 2010   #3
The guilt grew with each answer that I confidently circled.

The guilt grew with each answer that I had confidently circled.

This is an example of an essay that is written very well, but then the writer can look back to the beginning and see if the first sentence was really necessary. Let yourself write any first sentence you want to write when you are trying to get the first draft written, but go back later and trim away all sentences that come before the first really good one. In this case, there is one sentence that comes before the really good one:

I walked towards the back of the room to begin taking the test that I had missed days before when I was out sick from school. The teacher handed me the test, and as I scanned the front page a strong pang of guilt hit me.

Above, that really good sentence has action and sensory words... intriguing emotional content... it's very good! So, let the essay begin there.

:-)


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