'selection of clubs' - Why interested in Georgia Tech?

Prompt:

Why are you interested in Georgia Tech and what can you contribute to our community? (150 Word Limit)

Essay/Response:

To be honest, the first thing that sold Georgia Tech to me was its location: the breathtaking Atlanta, a place I have loved since I was a boy. Delving into the university's academic programs, I found that the Computational Media Program was both cutting edge and close at heart, combining my designer's persona with my interest in computer science -- something I have had little exposure to. As a Georgia Tech alumni, I hope to further Georgia Tech's motto of "Progress and Service" through involvement and leadership in the school's MOVE volunteer organization, the North Avenue Review magazine and the nationally accredited Blueprint yearbook. I also see Georgia Tech's numerous selection of clubs and sports as an extension of who I am and what I love. From Sympathetic Vibrations Acapella and the India Club to Muay Thai and Bollywood Dance classes, Georgia Tech embodies my personal and ethnic culture. (149 Words)

All help is greatly appreciated! Any grammar or style corrections welcome. Help with the actual prompt or anything that can better my essay is recognized.

Thanks in advance for any help, suggestions, feedback and complements!

Something is missing in this essay. Please go over the sequence by which you combined the different ideas.

Make sure to answer the prompt: Why are you interested in Georgia Tech and what can you contribute to our community?

You explained why is it that your interested in Georiga Tech but you didn't tell how exactly can you contribute to our community. In the second part of your essay, you talk about the different things that Georgia Tech has to offer and why you love those things but you don't go into what you can add to Georgia Tech.

P.S. I'm also applying, hope to see you there :)

Thanks for your feedback! I guess I have to make the response more concise to fit the second part of the question.

Kev101 -- Can you be a bit more specific about what is wrong? Is there something you didn't like about the structure and organization or is it that I could have addressed the second part of the question better

abhay4556 -- To expand on the second part of the question could I elaborate on how I want my volunteer service at MOVE to better the impoverished and the overall Atlanta community and how I want my involvement in the North Avenue Review (free speech journal) to advance human rights and guarantee that people all across America have the ability to speak freely -- or something along those lines?

Hope to see you there to! What major are you applying for?

Yeah, something along those lines. My major is probably computer engineering.

I believe that it's alright considering that some universities require the applicants to analyze (don't organize) when writing the essays/letters.