Columbia University is my first choice because this place value my character more than my standardized scores. Columbia preparing future leader and Ukraine need a new leader. Also, I want to solve world problems such as nuclear waste. Because of what happen at Chernobyl nuclear disaster I choose as my major be a chemical engineer to help 8 millions of people that were victims. Moreover, Columbia is the place where I can impress my passion to learn, while sharing Ukrainian culture and traditions with my new friends.
this is my first draft, please do not judge me too much, because I probably have a lot of mistakes. Is it a good idea? What should I add?
In the future I want to be a chemical engineer, because of what happened on the 26th of April, 1986. That was the day the powerful Chernobyl Nuclear Station was destroyed. In my country, Ukraine, this day is remembered as one of the worst days in our history. Many people in Ukraine still suffer from this terrible tragedy. But I believe that it could have been prevented. This fact worried me the most, because I felt irritated toward the Soviet Union's government for their lack of caution.
Columbia University is my first choice because Columbia preparing future leader and Ukraine need a new leader. My family could be affected too, but fortunately, the city they lived was on the big enough distance. By becoming a chemical engineer I feel that I can help innocent people who were affected. Moreover, Columbia is the place where I can impress my passion to learn, while sharing Ukrainian culture and traditions with my new friends.
my send draft. Is it getting better?
Hello,
You at least have a great story being a native of Ukraine with ties to the Chernobyl nuclear disaster. This is a great way to establish your reason for studying chemical engineering. Now what you need to do is talk about why you wish to study at Columbia. Saying that Columbia trains leaders will not help you at all. All Univeristies, in theory - train leaders. Talk about the resources at CU and how you plan to take full advantage of them so that you will become a great chemical engineer. -AAO
Hope this helps.
do you think it`s a good beginning? Honestly i do not know how to explain in word how big my desire to study in CU. I cannot just add that i like there labs and equipment. It is not just about studying in Ivy League school it is about learning. I do not want just to get degree and then work from Monday till Friday and than again and again. I live only once and i do not want to waste my life, I really want to help people. Please give me an advise, what should I add?
you've done a good yet okay to bad job. elaborate more on your chemical engineering part- that's more unique. the part about my passion to learn blah blah blah is generic and monotonous. how many times admission officers have heard this I don't know