Shortcomings is not a limit / Geophysical Engineering - Student Conference Application

Help me to improve my essay. Does my essay has been hit the point of my essay prompt?

Why did you choose this educational/professional path? What is the greatest thing you have learned on your educational path?
Energy resources is essential to the functioning of modern society. On the other hands, Energy plays important role in national security of any given country as a fuel to power the economic engine. Scarcity of energy resources will cause disruption to the country and lead to significant vulnerability.

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I think this is a great start! You definitely answered the prompt as far as why you choose your education path. I think there is still a little missing about the most important lesson you've learned. I think maybe it's already in your essay (I'm not sure if it is the lessons you've learned about teamwork with your fellow students, or if it is the practical lessons you've learned about gas exploration), but you could clarify it. Simply say, "The most important lesson I've learned so far is____", where the blank is the lesson.

Thank you EF_Alyssa your contribution means a lot to me.
here is my revision. Is there any idea that is still out of place?

Energy resources is essential to the functioning of modern society. On the other hands, Energy plays an important role in the national security of any given country as a fuel to power the economic engine. Scarcity of energy resources will cause disruption to the country and lead to significant vulnerability.

Indonesia has passed the peak top of its oil production. It used to be a net exporter oil but now it has dependence for exploring energy resource from other countries. It's an irony because as a geophysics student I learn about how much potency of natural resources that Indonesia has, but unfortunately most of the oil field that recently produced is a mature field and there has been no new discovery in decades. Since finding oil isn't as easy as it used to be, it needs more effort on research, cutting edge technologies, and new methodology with the expectation that Indonesia's reliance to the foreign oil supplies will reduced. Hence, I dreamed of being an exploration manager who leads the exploration to find the new discoveries of oil and gas field, so I started my major in geophysical engineering.

Geophysical Engineering in my university is newly established in 2003 and has given me a lot life lessons. It's not surprising that this study program doesn't has comparable facilities like in renowned college that has been long-standing.

This newly established status made us less selfish and actively learning. The existing shortcomings made us aware of the need to share the knowledge each other. Not all the students have the chance to work on a project in a company. So we share all the knowledge that we got in weekly presentations after class hour. The most important lesson I've learned so far is this shortcoming triggers us not only to strengthened our academic knowledge but also intensified our social bonding. If I grant the SEP, I have the responsibility to share my experience to all students in my department. By learning more about what world, hopefully I can act and contribute proportionally, both as local and global citizen.

Great job expanding on what you've learned!

Just a quick tweak, and I think you'll be in good shape: