Hi Kevin,
Regarding the Career Goals Essay, following your suggestions, I have now come up with my first draft. Will you please review it and let me know. It has almost 150 words over the 500 word limit, so I will really appreciate if you can point me some words which may be taken out.
Thanks in advance for your great help.
Question: Discuss your career goals. What skills do you expect to gain from studying at INSEAD and how will they contribute to your professional career. (500 words approx.)
Answer: Secretary of Planning Commission, Government of India, calls me to discuss ADB funding for high speed rail connecting the four Indian metropolises. The Indonesian Minister of Transportation seeks my help in strategic planning for multiple underwater tunnels connecting Indonesia, Singapore and Malaysia. This is not a fantasy, this is my career vision. An immense growth of infrastructure and transportation, through international funding, is going to be the buzzword in the near future for developing nations around the globe. I want to start an organization, providing advisory service to the governments of developing countries in the Asia Pacific region to procure international loans and generate internal revenues for transportation and infrastructure development. My organization will play a vital role in influencing the policy makers of these nations to ensure sustainable, safe and efficient transportation for the public.
Added to my seven years of progressive technical experience in the government and public sector, I will need international business insights to fulfill this future vision. Following my MBA, I want to join an international development organization such as ADB or World Bank as an infrastructure and investment specialist. I will focus on strategic planning, including financing, governance and management of major transportation projects in developing countries, specifically in south-east Asia. Alternatively, I may join private consulting firms such as PricewaterhouseCoopers or Bain & Company as a strategy consultant, helping public sector clients with raising funds for infrastructure projects or procuring private sector partners. With special attention to highway safety and mass transit, I will help the governing agencies devise long-term plans to manage rapid growth in a sustainable, environment-friendly way. Additionally, I will assist governments, NGO's and public sector entities in the planning and implementation of economically viable and socially sustainable development projects through effective public-private partnerships.
An MBA from Insead, the pioneer of international business education, will give me the business skills as related to strategic planning and financial operations in rapidly developing global markets. With my advanced technical expertise , core classes in finance and strategy will set the foundation for my business leadership. Courses such as "Global Strategy & Management" and "International Political Analysis" will introduce me to business trends around the world and "Strategies for Asia Pacific" will directly address my immediate career goal. Considering my future business venture, I expect to learn entrepreneurship skills and fundamental concepts of organizational strategy and how to use limited resources to publicize my services to a targeted niche market.
Unique to Insead, the choice of two fully integrated campuses and the Wharton alliance will not only give me exposure to job markets in Europe and Asia, but also prepare me as a truly international, transcultural business leader. As everyone is a minority at Insead, I will be able to strengthen my team-building and interpersonal skills by working with the most variant educational community in the world. My rich international experience in teamwork and leadership, while studying and working in three different countries, will be a perfect fit with the diverse, global philosophy of Insead education. The intense exchange of a multitude of ideas and experiences in the collaborative study groups will enrich my intellect and give me a worldly perspective of modern business. The accelerated pace of the academic program will bolster my skills of time management. The rigorous curriculum and vibrant lifestyle at Insead will further motivate me to strive for excellence. As I graduate, I will join the multicolor, close-knit and vast family of almost 40,000 Insead alumni, with whom I will share a professional and personal bond for life.
Continuing my passion for active participation and event management, I look forward to organize the Global Leader Series program. Also, my vision and insights for a business venture will help me elevate the dialogue in my classes and become an active member of the Entrepreneurship and Consulting Clubs. As I embark on my journey to become a global business leader, I am eager to experience the most productive one-year of my life at Insead.
Use a semi-colon or it will be a kind of run on sentence called a "comma splice"
This is not a fantasy; this is my career vision. (right here, end the first paragraph and start paragraph 2)
I think it'll be great to end the paragraph right there, a great way to lead the reader's attention.
Wow, I love it. This is the kind of essay that seems most impressive... one that PROVES that yo have a clear plan. MOST KIDS CAN'T DO THAT!! So, it is impressive.
As I graduate, I will join the multicolor, close-knit and vast family of almost 40,000 Insead alumni, with whom I will share a professional and personal bond for life.---- awesome sentence!! But is INSEAD an acronym I think all letters should be capitalized, right?
This is a great essay, and you will definitely impress the reader...
