Applications for the UC's are due in less tahn 3 weeks. Feed back would be much appreciated on my essays.
UC Personal Statements
Prompt 1: Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Some people's life revolves around their family or their community, but my world revolves around soccer and school of course. I fell in love with the game once I started playing at the age of five and have been playing ever since. Being the oldest of the first generation to be born in the United States, my dad was not presented with many opportunities to play sports and be involved with extracurricular activities. Realizing this motivates me because I want to make the best of the opportunities that are presented to me.
Even during my times of injury when it was physically impossible for me to play, I never left the game of soccer. My junior year of high school was when things looked as if they would not get better. For starters, I strained my right hip flexor during the preseason of league. Straining my hip flexor was a minor setback, which kept me out for four weeks. During those four weeks I still went to every practice to support the team. Once I started gaining mobility back in my hip, I started running with the team and gradually increased my workout load until I could fully practice. The week before the season started history repeated itself, this time straining my left hip flexor. Contrast to the first time it happened, this time I went to a physical therapist twice a week to help heal faster and strengthen my hip flexor in order to prevent injuries in the future. Injuring my hip for a second time made me realize that I could not play soccer indefinitely, and made me think about better ways to be involved in the soccer world that would not only benefit me, but other people as well.
The solution presented itself to me when my younger brother went to try out for a traveling soccer team. I realized that since I could not play soccer due to my injury, I could help coach the team along side the head coach. My goal as an assistant was to not only shape them into top quality soccer players, but as society members as well. Helping my brother's team made me aware that it was more important to focus on the future than to focus on the present.
I was told once that the best way to predict the future is to create it. I want to accomplish that by creating the future with my career. I aspire to become the best at whatever I put my mind to. Whether it is aerospace engineering or being a physical therapist. Pursuing happiness is a birth given right that I will apply to my future.
Prompt 2: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
Ever since I was five years old I was playing the game of soccer. It was my dad's decision to sign me up for the soccer team at my local school because he wanted me to explore different sports and extracurricular to find what I like best. I remember my first soccer practice I was so timid that I did not want to participate in practice. Over the years as I became a better soccer player my parents made the decision to move me to a competitive team. Just after two years of being on the team my passion for the game of soccer and hard work paid off when I was awarded the captains band and was given a more prominent role on the team. Getting the captains band was an accomplishment in itself, even though it added weight to my shoulders. Among the responsibilities of being captain were: becoming a role model, leading by example, motivating players to do their best, and instilling confidence in players. Becoming captain led me to understand aspects of myself that I could not have found out any other way. For instance, it taught me how to respond to situations while under pressure, stress, and how to resolve conflicts.
During the championship game of a nationally recognized tournament final was when my leadership skills were put to the test. Things started off going awry by us getting scored on in the first ten minutes of play. Still trailing by one at half time, I rallied my troops and told them that it was no longer a simple game of soccer, but a war in which there would only be one team standing in the end. From this point on it was not a matter of who had more skill or who could do what with the ball, but it was how much heart you had and just how much you wanted to win. We tied the game within fifteen minutes of the start of the second half, and we were undoubtedly dominating. Eventually the ball appeared at my feet and with the goal in front of me I knew what had to be done. As I shot, everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. In a matter of seconds I heard the unquestionable sound of the ball hitting the net and immediately my teammates come storming after me because I scored the go ahead goal and the eventual game-winning goal. All the months of hard work, long practices, and keeping the team focused on soccer finally produced results.
Reflecting back on my journey, I realize that playing soccer has taught me more about myself than anything else. Soccer made me grow as a person in terms of discipline and confidence, and it taught me the value of hard work and dedication. Captaining my soccer team showed me that in order to be successful on the soccer field, you must apply the characteristics of a captain -being a role model, respect, and dignity- off the field in everyday life. Striving to do my best Soccer has helped me get to where I am now and I will use what I have learned playing soccer and apply it to my next challenge, college.
UC Personal Statements
Prompt 1: Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Some people's life revolves around their family or their community, but my world revolves around soccer and school of course. I fell in love with the game once I started playing at the age of five and have been playing ever since. Being the oldest of the first generation to be born in the United States, my dad was not presented with many opportunities to play sports and be involved with extracurricular activities. Realizing this motivates me because I want to make the best of the opportunities that are presented to me.
Even during my times of injury when it was physically impossible for me to play, I never left the game of soccer. My junior year of high school was when things looked as if they would not get better. For starters, I strained my right hip flexor during the preseason of league. Straining my hip flexor was a minor setback, which kept me out for four weeks. During those four weeks I still went to every practice to support the team. Once I started gaining mobility back in my hip, I started running with the team and gradually increased my workout load until I could fully practice. The week before the season started history repeated itself, this time straining my left hip flexor. Contrast to the first time it happened, this time I went to a physical therapist twice a week to help heal faster and strengthen my hip flexor in order to prevent injuries in the future. Injuring my hip for a second time made me realize that I could not play soccer indefinitely, and made me think about better ways to be involved in the soccer world that would not only benefit me, but other people as well.
The solution presented itself to me when my younger brother went to try out for a traveling soccer team. I realized that since I could not play soccer due to my injury, I could help coach the team along side the head coach. My goal as an assistant was to not only shape them into top quality soccer players, but as society members as well. Helping my brother's team made me aware that it was more important to focus on the future than to focus on the present.
I was told once that the best way to predict the future is to create it. I want to accomplish that by creating the future with my career. I aspire to become the best at whatever I put my mind to. Whether it is aerospace engineering or being a physical therapist. Pursuing happiness is a birth given right that I will apply to my future.
Prompt 2: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
Ever since I was five years old I was playing the game of soccer. It was my dad's decision to sign me up for the soccer team at my local school because he wanted me to explore different sports and extracurricular to find what I like best. I remember my first soccer practice I was so timid that I did not want to participate in practice. Over the years as I became a better soccer player my parents made the decision to move me to a competitive team. Just after two years of being on the team my passion for the game of soccer and hard work paid off when I was awarded the captains band and was given a more prominent role on the team. Getting the captains band was an accomplishment in itself, even though it added weight to my shoulders. Among the responsibilities of being captain were: becoming a role model, leading by example, motivating players to do their best, and instilling confidence in players. Becoming captain led me to understand aspects of myself that I could not have found out any other way. For instance, it taught me how to respond to situations while under pressure, stress, and how to resolve conflicts.
During the championship game of a nationally recognized tournament final was when my leadership skills were put to the test. Things started off going awry by us getting scored on in the first ten minutes of play. Still trailing by one at half time, I rallied my troops and told them that it was no longer a simple game of soccer, but a war in which there would only be one team standing in the end. From this point on it was not a matter of who had more skill or who could do what with the ball, but it was how much heart you had and just how much you wanted to win. We tied the game within fifteen minutes of the start of the second half, and we were undoubtedly dominating. Eventually the ball appeared at my feet and with the goal in front of me I knew what had to be done. As I shot, everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. In a matter of seconds I heard the unquestionable sound of the ball hitting the net and immediately my teammates come storming after me because I scored the go ahead goal and the eventual game-winning goal. All the months of hard work, long practices, and keeping the team focused on soccer finally produced results.
Reflecting back on my journey, I realize that playing soccer has taught me more about myself than anything else. Soccer made me grow as a person in terms of discipline and confidence, and it taught me the value of hard work and dedication. Captaining my soccer team showed me that in order to be successful on the soccer field, you must apply the characteristics of a captain -being a role model, respect, and dignity- off the field in everyday life. Striving to do my best Soccer has helped me get to where I am now and I will use what I have learned playing soccer and apply it to my next challenge, college.