SOP for undergrad mechanical engineering "How Things Work"

please help me to complete my sop. need to submit it within 48 hours.

Right from childhood fantasize how things work. Tried to understand the mechanics behind how the toys worked and that amazed me a lot. I used to dismantle toys and try to grasp how they work right from that very age.this helped me to build a very analytical sight to look at things around.

As my father runs a construction company,he helped me understand the machines at his site and each time I wish I could do some modifications in them and enhance their capacity and working. In school and college, practicals seemed more interesting to me as I got to experiment with different things and could analyze the results.In college I learnt the basics of c++ and assembly language which took my interest in mechanics to next level.Apart from studies I also took part in many extra curricular activities such as drawing,swimming and astronomy.

I have come to a stage where I want to learn more about mechanics and will love to pursue mechanical engineering,as this will strengthen the roots of my interest in the subject.After completing engineering I plan to help my father in his business and take it to a new horizon.

The reason to choose UK for Engineering s because it focuses more on practical knowledge and provides a global exposure to students in every field

--In school and college, practicals seemed..
--Capitalize 'I' wherever you use it...
--Open toys...use some word like dismantle or disassemble and not OPEN.
--in college i learned basics of c++ and assembly language..Since, you are applying to UK, I'd suggest you use the word 'learnt '(British Eng), instead of 'learned'(American Eng).

--Also, 'the' is missing- in college, I learnt the basics...
--I have come to a stage where I want to learn more about M echanics and would love to pursueM echanical E ngineering...
--the reason to choose UK for this (for what?..elaborate) is because it focuses...

can u please suggest me some more points to add to it?

Here is a way to establish your main idea and then end the first paragraph.

Ever since childhood I have fantasizes about how things work. I tried to understand the mechanics behind how the toys worked and that amazed me a lot. I used to dismantle toys and try to grasp how they work right from that very age. This helped me to build a very analytical perspective that helps me to correctly perceive the things around me. My analytical abilities have recently shown me that I am best suited for a career in mechanical engineering and that the best program for me is XXXXXXX.

(begin paragraph 2)
This desire that motivates me now is rooted in experiences from my past. As my father runs a construction ...