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'my strong conviction of helping people' - George Washington Univ.


crystal77 8 / 13 1  
Jan 4, 2012   #1
I remembered that day well. I was sent to deliver a letter while volunteering at the Howard University Hospital. It was the last floor, Radiology, nothing specific and nothing I thought I had not seen before. Before, I could confirm my judgment, I was strapped with a mask cautioned to keep it on and not take it off until I left. While still in shock I witnessed first-hand of patients in their sick beds, patients who had their blood drawn, and patients who were on life support; there were oxygen masks everywhere and prescriptions of all sorts. How intricate, I thought of the procedures applied as I rapidly scanned the room of all its new found horror. Anything and everything caught my eye. And these were HealthCare workers. So abruptly, the daze was over as I handed the tolerant yet puzzled doctor the letter. Seeing that I left the site the pungent smell lingered through the hall; the phenomenal feeling of what I saw still remains.

I really enjoyed reading the introduction. It is a very good hook!
Speculating on this subject, I always look towards the bigger picture; to where I am headed. Before, I was unsure of what I wanted to study in college, but my strong conviction towards helping people, especially in the hospital, changed my perception of what I used to think a healthcare worker's job truly was? I never really looked at the essence of the matter. Healthcare workers were just there to do their job; giving medication and treatment to those who were sick or filing and delivering letters and prescriptions when patients requested it. Did they even enjoy their job? In essence, I realized that merely working in the hospital was not a job. It was a passion, a career, set by people who had the same dream I enjoyed. I know that to achieve I need a proper education full of intellectual changes and personal developments. I believe that George Washington University will help mold me into a well-rounded, scholarly, and most importantly an attentive healthcare worker.

College is about trying new things and seeing what works for you and what does not work for you and seeing what you are good at and what you are not good at. In high school, I was still trying to figure out who I was. I wanted to meet new people and interact with different races. I have always been around people of the same race. I "need" diversity. I strongly believe with an exposure to a more diverse setting I would be able obtain a healthier understanding of what I want to become. I believe George Washington University, with its vast spectrum of diversity and medical influences would be instrumental in helping me institute a more effective role in the HealthCare community. With its extensive Accelerated Medical Program, I plan to develop a powerful medical sense in hopes of undergoing first-hand medical procedures within my future uprisings. I strongly believe that a thorough awareness of policies and procedures within the medical arena would be essential for effectively studying Medicine.

I want to go to college so that I can pursue my dream of helping children who suffer from cancer, Aids, or any other terminal illnesses. With the enriched curriculum that George Washington provides, my enrollment in this university will give me a definite opportunity for future advancement in my academic and career goals. The first sentence of this paragraph sounds weird, because to me, it sounds like you want to go to ANY college.

OR
I was strapped with a mask cautioned to keep it on and not take it off until I left. While still in shock I witnessed patients in their sick beds, their blood drawn, and on life support. At every angle, I saw people wearing oxygen masks and prescriptions of all sorts. How intricate, I thought of the medical procedures as I rapidly scanned the room of all its new found horror. Anything and everything caught my eye. So abruptly, the daze was over as I handed the tolerant yet puzzled doctor the letter. As I left the site, a pungent smell lingered through the hall; the phenomenal feeling of what I experienced and saw still remains. I had been watching HealthCare workers.

Before, I was unsure of what I wanted to study in college, but my strong conviction of helping people, especially in the hospital, has changed my perception of a healthcare worker's job. I never really looked at the essence of the matter; I thought healthcare workers were just there to do their jobs; giving medication and treatment to those who were sick, or filing and delivering letters and prescriptions when patients requested it. Did they even enjoy their job? In essence, I realized that merely working in the hospital does not qualify one to be a healthcare worker, but I have learned from real healthcare workers that pursing and obtaining a career in the field of health and medicine require motivation. However, I do not merely have a motivation to work in the field of health, but a potent passion to improve the lives of others. I know that to achieve I need a proper education where I can develop intellectually, spiritually, and emotionally. I believe that George Washington University will help mold me into a well-rounded scholar, and a future healthcare worker.

College is about trying new things and seeing what works for you and what does not work for you. It is also about discovering your strengths and weaknesses. Moreover, I strongly believe with an exposure to a more diverse setting I would be able obtain a better understanding of what I want to become. I believe George Washington University, with its vast spectrum of diversity and medical influences would be instrumental in helping me institute a more effective role in the HealthCare community. With its extensive Accelerated Medical Program, I plan to develop a powerful medical basis in hopes of undergoing first-hand medical procedures in the future. I strongly believe that a thorough awareness of the health disparities in the medical arena would be essential for effectively studying Medicine. With the enriched curriculum that George Washington University provides, my enrollment in this university will give me a definite opportunity for future advancement in my academic and career goals.

I really like the last two paragraphs. Also, I like how you talked about why you choose George Washington University. It shows your great interest in that school. I would say, like

jadore_lamode68, that your 2nd essay is better, but the introduction from the 1st essay is good.


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