I have written a reflective essay it had to be between 900-1200 words which I have done. Just looking for some feedback before I submit my paper. Would be much appreciated.
Success Is Certain
It's 1999 my final year at primary school. I've just spent the last six years of my life making new friends and learning new things. It had been the best six years of my young life so far. I had always enjoyed learning and gaining new knowledge. My teachers were great; I had a lot of respect for them. Now here I was almost ready to leave primary school and embark on the next chapter of my life, high school. I had been told by my older brother and sister what high school was like, different teachers, always on the move, meeting new friends and having a great time. I had high hopes; I thought I would thrive in high school.
I started high school in 2000 and was an eager 11 year old willing to learn for the first two years, then in 2001 my parents' got a divorce. Soon after I started misbehaving at home and being disobedient towards my parents'. I guess I just wanted to cause a commotion that would direct everyone's attention away from the divorce. Meanwhile I was still a good student at school for another year at least.
In 2002 I went into third year and was 13 years old. Now, I'm not entirely sure what caused me to throw away my opportunity of getting a good education. It was probably a mixture of things the divorce, my behaviour and attitude. Yes they all seem like good things to put the blame on. It's always easier to put the blame on your surroundings rather than yourself but I have and always will take responsibility for my own actions and that's what it was. Most of my teachers didn't help either.
Where do I begin with my teachers? Most of them weren't that interested in teaching us. Quite frankly, it was much easier for them to hand out textbooks and just let us get on with it. I always felt, well honestly, a little bit neglected, which in turn just made me think "Well fine, if you don't teach me I just won't bother making an effort to learn." My English teacher made us do dictation for the first two years; it almost bored me to death. I used to envision myself jumping out the window (we were on the third floor) it seemed more appealing than dictation and I have never once needed that skill since leaving school, which just makes me think "You've just wasted two years of my life and I'm never getting them back!" I look back on my school years with nothing but resentment. It wasn't just the way the teachers taught me, it was the way many of them spoke to me as if I were an imbecile. I felt as though I had been judged the minute I walked in the door. Very few teachers seemed to care about any of the students (by this point you're probably thinking I'm just having a good old moan, I'm not, honestly!) we were made to feel like inconveniences, our education appeared to be the last thing on most of the teachers' minds. Yet I still wanted to learn, I wanted the same opportunities as everyone else when I left school. Looking back I think this internal conflict of hating school but actually wanting an education was perhaps the root cause of my problems. Next thing I know I'm 15 in fourth year and it's exam time.
It's the first day of exams; I turn up for my exams haven't revised once, wing it and hope for the best. Safe to say, I only passed a few exams (that was purely down to luck I take no credit what so ever) and felt like a complete failure. The whole exam experience only deepened my resentment for the teachers that I felt had failed me by not teaching me properly. So I left school got a dead end job and felt miserable and depressed for the most part. Was this life? Was this all I had to look forward to because I thought my social life was more important than turning up for classes? I mean just because I didn't do well at school didn't mean I was incapable of learning did it?
So six years after leaving school I enrolled in college, I was still more than willing to learn. I knew I was intelligent (not being pompous just stating a fact). My only concern was about the lecturers; was I going to resent them because of my experience at school? Well as it turns out no. They have a very different style of teaching from school teachers. Lecturers seem to genuinely want you to succeed but make it clear that you will only succeed if you make the effort.
Looking back on my experience at high school I feel it made me resent and at times hate learning, despite wanting to learn. They say your school years are supposed to be the most happy and formative years of your life, well not mine. Not high school; those were the most frustrating and tedious years I ever had. Did I learn anything? Well first and foremost I've learned that the next person who dictates to me will probably need to duck from the inanimate object coming towards their head! Having said that I have also learned not to judge a book by its cover. Just because I have had a couple of bad experiences with teachers doesn't mean all teachers/lecturers make learning a chore. There are some who make it fun. Although I do feel my school years helped shape me in to the person I am today. I'm cautious yet eager, willing but stubborn. I guess school is what ultimately defines your personality. It teaches you about relationships between adults and children and if for whatever reason you have a bad relationship with teachers it tends to stick with you in any classroom situation no matter how old you are. College is proving to be a far more positive experience. Any concerns I had about the lecturers being like my school teachers were soon laid to rest. They didn't dictate to me, the lecturers would take time to explain things and make sure I understood what I had to do. They treated me like a person. The whole experience overall has taught me that even if you don't succeed the first time there is absolutely nothing stopping you from trying again regardless of age. You're never too old for education. Never ever say never.