hey! soo this is my entrance essay.. i need some help coming up with a closure for the ending. are my transitions ok too? or do they need work?
thanks for the help!
FIT prompt: What makes you a good canditiate for FIT? Why are you interested in the major you are applying to? the essay is alos your chance to tell us more about you experiences, activites,and accomplishments. (no more that 750 words please)
Ever since I moved to California, there always was a 7-11 store across the apartment complexes and the houses I resided at. My parents wouldn't mind if I occasionally took a stroll there to pick up some snacks or a cold beverage in the afternoons. Throughout the entire store, a specific area that perpetually caught my attention most was the bottom left of the magazine stand, where the fashion magazines sat patiently and waited to be viewed. At that point in my life, fashion was like grass to me-it just, well, existed. I contained no ambition or admiration for it. As a child, I wore the same silhouette consisting of my favorite red Old Navy jacket, my Sketchers with pink laces, and regular flared jeans. Though the world of fashion seemed too glamorous at the time, the start of a flame grew inside of me every time I took a glance at the covers that gazed the bottom left side of the magazine stand. After staying at the 7-11 stores for long periods at a time looking at editorials, articles, and runway photographs, I knew that this world was something I wasn't going to let go of. It wasn't until I grew older and matured that I realized the concept, liveliness, and fluidity that fashion possesses molded me into the person I am today and the person I ought to be in my life.
Growing up I never really had a normal childhood life. Since I was a part of a family that contained three younger siblings and overworking parents, it was required for me to mature and evolve into adulthood quickly. Hence, I spent that time and my early adolescent years trying to discover who I was as a person and what I wanted to do with my life. I tried to participate in a wide range of activities to acquaintance and experiment with new elements. In the end, I always caught myself coming back to fashion. I enjoyed the originality of writing and art, but my love for fashion remained the dominant path I wanted to travel. There were no hesitations or fear when it came to fashion. It was my own sanctuary where no one can judge or say what is right or wrong. During my freshman year of high school, I decided that fashion design was the career I wanted to endure. One of my strengths is being creative with simple objects. Give me two yards of fabric and I'll turn it into a dress, but the more and more I learned about it the less I felt attached and captivated. What I wanted for my future was something more challenging, extensive, and, most importantly, different from what I was accustomed to. I itched to find something that will challenge me, something that would take me and my knowledge of fashion to new heights.
Towards the end of my junior year, I helped in a charity fashion show for my school's fashion club. I was given the opportunity to sum up ensembles that adapted to the theme of the fashion show. Form that day on, I knew that is what I envisioned myself doing for my future. When I discovered the Fashion Institute of Technology and its Fashion Merchandising Management program, I instantly knew it was everything I wanted and even more than I expected. The binding of the business world and the fashion world, I think, makes the fashion industry flourish even more. In this program, I love how I would get the opportunity to intertwine my creativity and critical thinking skills I've obtained throughout my academic years. I truly believe that an education at FIT will take me far in a fashion career and also in life. Growing up in small cities in Hawaii and California, I never got the chance to full experience a large, urban, and fast-paced atmosphere. Having New York City stationed as its home and classroom will introduce me to a whole world featuring diverse cultures and a brand new environment. Not only will the Fashion Institute of Technology help me cradle a future, but it also opens portals to unknown territories that I will have to confront, learn, and conquer.
thanks for the help!
FIT prompt: What makes you a good canditiate for FIT? Why are you interested in the major you are applying to? the essay is alos your chance to tell us more about you experiences, activites,and accomplishments. (no more that 750 words please)
Ever since I moved to California, there always was a 7-11 store across the apartment complexes and the houses I resided at. My parents wouldn't mind if I occasionally took a stroll there to pick up some snacks or a cold beverage in the afternoons. Throughout the entire store, a specific area that perpetually caught my attention most was the bottom left of the magazine stand, where the fashion magazines sat patiently and waited to be viewed. At that point in my life, fashion was like grass to me-it just, well, existed. I contained no ambition or admiration for it. As a child, I wore the same silhouette consisting of my favorite red Old Navy jacket, my Sketchers with pink laces, and regular flared jeans. Though the world of fashion seemed too glamorous at the time, the start of a flame grew inside of me every time I took a glance at the covers that gazed the bottom left side of the magazine stand. After staying at the 7-11 stores for long periods at a time looking at editorials, articles, and runway photographs, I knew that this world was something I wasn't going to let go of. It wasn't until I grew older and matured that I realized the concept, liveliness, and fluidity that fashion possesses molded me into the person I am today and the person I ought to be in my life.
Growing up I never really had a normal childhood life. Since I was a part of a family that contained three younger siblings and overworking parents, it was required for me to mature and evolve into adulthood quickly. Hence, I spent that time and my early adolescent years trying to discover who I was as a person and what I wanted to do with my life. I tried to participate in a wide range of activities to acquaintance and experiment with new elements. In the end, I always caught myself coming back to fashion. I enjoyed the originality of writing and art, but my love for fashion remained the dominant path I wanted to travel. There were no hesitations or fear when it came to fashion. It was my own sanctuary where no one can judge or say what is right or wrong. During my freshman year of high school, I decided that fashion design was the career I wanted to endure. One of my strengths is being creative with simple objects. Give me two yards of fabric and I'll turn it into a dress, but the more and more I learned about it the less I felt attached and captivated. What I wanted for my future was something more challenging, extensive, and, most importantly, different from what I was accustomed to. I itched to find something that will challenge me, something that would take me and my knowledge of fashion to new heights.
Towards the end of my junior year, I helped in a charity fashion show for my school's fashion club. I was given the opportunity to sum up ensembles that adapted to the theme of the fashion show. Form that day on, I knew that is what I envisioned myself doing for my future. When I discovered the Fashion Institute of Technology and its Fashion Merchandising Management program, I instantly knew it was everything I wanted and even more than I expected. The binding of the business world and the fashion world, I think, makes the fashion industry flourish even more. In this program, I love how I would get the opportunity to intertwine my creativity and critical thinking skills I've obtained throughout my academic years. I truly believe that an education at FIT will take me far in a fashion career and also in life. Growing up in small cities in Hawaii and California, I never got the chance to full experience a large, urban, and fast-paced atmosphere. Having New York City stationed as its home and classroom will introduce me to a whole world featuring diverse cultures and a brand new environment. Not only will the Fashion Institute of Technology help me cradle a future, but it also opens portals to unknown territories that I will have to confront, learn, and conquer.