((I feel like I'm not saying something so any feedback is helpful))
My mother always told me that "Knowledge is power ",My unique education experience really showed there's no right way to achieve it. My first school experience was a catholic school I wore a uniform my book bag had wheels and I would be given hours of homework and this was only kindergarten to second grade. At the end of my second grade year my mother asked me if I was interested in trying homeschooling which I agreed to because even though I did like my school I really couldn't compete to the amount of homework that I was being and I had trouble focusing in class. I was homeschooled for six years and during that time I really enjoyed the trips we went on and having a really unique custom learning style but I wanted to try something new and that's how I found the Brooklyn Free school. The Brooklyn Free school is a democratic school which gives students an equal say in their education and how the school is ran, being there I really got to find out who I am and who I wanted to be it really gave me the tools to strengthen social skills I wasn't really learning and how I really learned at that school was mostly through conversation and gained leadership skills which I needed to able to be confident in my opinions and knowing how to guide others but ultimately I simply wasn't practicing the essentials enough such as reading, writing, arithmetic
I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but you're missing a lot of punctuation.
My mother always told me that "Knowledge is power ",the "M" here shouldn't be capitalized if you're going to keep the comma My unique education experience really showed there's no right way to achieve it. My first school experience was a catholic school where I wore a uniform and my book bag had wheels.and I would be given hours of homework and this was onlyfrom kindergarten to second grade. At the end of my second grade year, my mother asked me if I was interested in trying homeschooling, which I agreed to, because even though I did like my school, I really couldn't compete towith the amount of homework that I was being given and I had trouble focusing in class. I was homeschooled for six years and during that time I really enjoyed the trips we went on and having a really unique custom learning style, but I wanted to try something new, and that's how I found the Brooklyn Free school. The Brooklyn Free school is a democratic school whichthat gives students an equal say in their education and how the school is ran. B eing there I really got to find out who I am and who I wanted to be.I t really gave me the tools to strengthen social skills that I wasn't previouslyreally learning, and how I really learned at that school was mostly through conversation, and gained leadership skills whichthat I needed to able to be confident in my opinions and knowing how to guide others, but ultimately, I simply practicingwasn't exposed to the essentials enough such as reading, writing, arithmetic.
There are probably parts in here that I didn't completely cover, but this is the way I would PERSONALLY fix it. You had a good idea, just some simple errors. Hope this helps a little!
Dominique, aside from the punctuation problems that Morgan pointed out, your essay also suffers from lack of content, focus, and direction. It is almost like you did not really give much thought to writing this essay. We can help you fine tune the essay and give it more content but we first need to know what particular prompt you are trying to answer. That way we can suggest topics and themes for you to choose from which can help you in developing a more centered / focused essay. Don't be afraid to let us in on the prompt. We are here to help you out :-) You are supposed to tell a unique story about your schooling, so we need to find something in your past school experiences that could be considered as such. Is there any exciting experience that stands out for you? We can help you spin that into a unique story for this essay. Let's see what we can do to help you out :-)
