UPenn Professor Essay (studying people's personalities)

Name a Penn Professor with who you would like to study or conduct research with, explain why.

It's not much, but it's all I could really write. Let me know what you think.

While Psychology in itself interests me, I'm particularly interested in studying people's personalities. Not the general thoughts of people, but what separates us from each other. That's why studying with Professor David Williams would be an amazing experience for me. His work in Personality Theory, trying to understand human nature to be more than mechanical, but creative and free and individual fascinates me to no end. I've always built strong connections with my teachers, but they're always stronger when we share a common interest. I've built a stronger relationship with my English teachers because of this. But now, I see a new chance in a sea of professors from tens of schools. I see a teacher whom I can really connect with.

Changes I made are in bold.

While Psychology in itself interests me, I am particularly interested in studying people's personalities. Not the general thoughts of people, but what separates us from each other. That is why studying with Professor David Williams would be an amazing opportunity for me. His work in Personality Theory, trying to understand human nature to be more than mechanical, but creative, free and individual, fascinates me to no end. I have always made strong connections with my teachers, but they areundoubtedly stronger when we share a common interest. I have built a stronger relationship with my English teacher because of this. Yet now I see a new chance in a sea of professors from tens of schools. (this sentence is awkward) I see a teacher whom I can really connect with. (last sentence needs work)

Overall- rather good. Nice work/relationship balance.

I say English teachers because I'm talking of all four I've had as a high school student.

His work in Personality Theory, trying to understand human nature to be more than mechanical, but creative and free and individuals fascinates me to no end.

I've always built strong connections with my teachers, but they're stronger when we share a common interest.

I've built a stronger relationship with my English teachers because of this. But now, from this sea of professors from many schools, I've found a teacher with whom I can really connect .

Good luck!

:)