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UVa Supplements. Work of art, music, science, mathematics, or literature


PandaNinja015 1 / 1  
Dec 17, 2011   #1
1. What work of art, music, science, mathematics, or literature has surprised, unsettled, or challenged you, and in what way?

As a child, my conservative grandmother told me that homosexuality was a choice. I was too young to understand what that meant but I accepted it as a fact; in doing so, however, I unknowingly denied myself the opportunity to think independently. It wasn't until several years later, when I visited a used-books store and selected a text entitled Neuroscience, that I would begin to correct my mistake.

In one of book's chapters, it cites studies that identified neuroanatomical differences between hetero- and homosexual males that could influence their sexual orientation. Initially, I was uncertain of whether or not to continue- afraid of the answers it might contain. But I kept on reading; drawn by the question of if one's sexuality is a choice.

Unfortunately, the book was inconclusive, so I began to research extensively, digging through various journals and texts. All provided me a myriad of information regarding the brain, but none gave me a substantial answer. I was disappointed that my effort had led to mere ambiguity. But then I realized what I gained along with it; I managed to expunge my grandmother's notions and instilled my own beliefs - I became acquainted with the brain, inspired to further study the mechanisms that allow people to be who they are. And, most significantly, I discovered my passion: neurology. From that moment forward I made it my aspiration to become a neurologist, so that I could preserve the minds and abilities of others.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Dec 18, 2011   #2
You can improve your writing by omitting "that" whenever you get the chance. Kill the little weasel, or it'll suck the power out of your sentence. :-)

As a child, my conservative grandmother told me that homosexuality was a choice. I was too ...

a used-books store and selected a text entitled Neuroscience neuroscience, that I would begin to correct my mistake.

Just take out all unnecessary words. Readers like to do some of the work:
In one of book's chapters, it One chapter cites studies that identified identify neuroanatomical differences between...

All provided me a myriad of information ... do this a different way. Myriad is followed by a countable noun, I'm pretty sure.

Okay, excellent stuff here. Get specific about your goals. :-) Use a more descriptive thread title next time you post on essayforum. :-)


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