I like to believe that I'm a well-rounded person.
Generally, it's not a good idea to begin an application essay with "I like to believe." It rings false, leading the reader to distrust what comes next.
we've created an environment that has embodied my personal high standards
Is that some sort of biosphere in which you will live while pursuing your studies? If not, you need to reword this so that it makes sense. You seem to be just throwing a lot of words and phrases -- environment, embodied, high standards -- together and hoping they will make a sentence.
Vince Lombardi wrote, "Individual commitment to a group effort-that is what makes a team work, a company work, a society work, a civilization work."
Did he write that or say that? Check to be sure.
In summary, all that I get from this essay is that you are Christian and like to play sports. Because FSU is a public school, they can't favor Christians over people of other faiths. That leaves sports as the only thing you say about yourself that they might be able to use as a reason to accept you. Perhaps you could find some more specific things to say about yourself, your life, your achievements, or your aspirations?