I can only use one and I want to know which one is the best one. I would appreciate reactions, improvements, grammar, punctuation. I realize they are different lengths but which one has more potential- and what is the appropriate length for this common app question. Thank You!
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Essay 1
POETRY
That's right I write poetry. Say what you will but poetry is manly. People disagree, but I am not embarrassed or ashamed of something that boys my age regard as taboo. I'm not afraid of the challenge, I'm not afraid of my emotions, and I'm not afraid of my creativity. It's natural for me to give into my emotions and effortlessly write- it's like divine inspiration. It's not cerebral or methodical it's instinctual and natural. It like the floodgates have been opened, my hand scribbles incessantly trying to write as fast as my brain interprets what my heart is pumping out of my soul. It has intensity unmatched by a football game, a soccer match or any other sport. I pour everything into my writing. Poetry is every part as interactive as a club or sport; it requires all of my feelings, my dreams, and skills. It requires me to lose myself in the stories and in the words. A poet is absorbed in his art that he loses his identity. He forms a creation story, generating a society upon thought, a genesis that likens him to a God. He is a sailor, weathering the high seas thoroughly explored by others but challenged to write novelly. You are a farmer cultivating reflections and spreading seeds of wit and anticipating the drought of writers block. You are a carpenter, crafting and constructing the abstract beauty into tangible stanzas. I don't know of an activity more manly than poetry.
V.S.
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Essay 2
Planting
When people observe a flower they see a plant, a beautiful plant, but still a plant. Gertrude Stein crudely wrote, "A rose, is a rose, is a rose." To me flowers and plants are not that simple. The people that know me would be surprised to hear about my affinity for such delicate and feminine plants. When I observe a flower I experience the aroma trailblazing and evoking sensations and stories. When I watch my flowers bloom I feel the responsibilities of a parent caring for his child. For many people it is hard to believe that I raise orchids in my basement and have built a green house to grow vegetables for my Church's food pantry. When I am with these plants I connect, I grow, and I feel. The beauty of these plants comes not only from their aesthetics but from the place they hold in my heart.
--------------
Essay 1
POETRY
That's right I write poetry. Say what you will but poetry is manly. People disagree, but I am not embarrassed or ashamed of something that boys my age regard as taboo. I'm not afraid of the challenge, I'm not afraid of my emotions, and I'm not afraid of my creativity. It's natural for me to give into my emotions and effortlessly write- it's like divine inspiration. It's not cerebral or methodical it's instinctual and natural. It like the floodgates have been opened, my hand scribbles incessantly trying to write as fast as my brain interprets what my heart is pumping out of my soul. It has intensity unmatched by a football game, a soccer match or any other sport. I pour everything into my writing. Poetry is every part as interactive as a club or sport; it requires all of my feelings, my dreams, and skills. It requires me to lose myself in the stories and in the words. A poet is absorbed in his art that he loses his identity. He forms a creation story, generating a society upon thought, a genesis that likens him to a God. He is a sailor, weathering the high seas thoroughly explored by others but challenged to write novelly. You are a farmer cultivating reflections and spreading seeds of wit and anticipating the drought of writers block. You are a carpenter, crafting and constructing the abstract beauty into tangible stanzas. I don't know of an activity more manly than poetry.
V.S.
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Essay 2
Planting
When people observe a flower they see a plant, a beautiful plant, but still a plant. Gertrude Stein crudely wrote, "A rose, is a rose, is a rose." To me flowers and plants are not that simple. The people that know me would be surprised to hear about my affinity for such delicate and feminine plants. When I observe a flower I experience the aroma trailblazing and evoking sensations and stories. When I watch my flowers bloom I feel the responsibilities of a parent caring for his child. For many people it is hard to believe that I raise orchids in my basement and have built a green house to grow vegetables for my Church's food pantry. When I am with these plants I connect, I grow, and I feel. The beauty of these plants comes not only from their aesthetics but from the place they hold in my heart.
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