Unanswered [4] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

IELTS Academic- stringent age rules to reduce the road accidents.


sri_1 5 / 8 5  
Nov 26, 2013   #1
q : The best way to reduce the number of traffic accidents is to raise age limit for the younger drivers and limit the age of the older ones. do you agree?

Essay :

Road accidents are definitely tragic. It results in huge loss of life, property and mental peace. The argument put forth is, limiting the eligible age for driving will in turn reduce the road accidents effectively.

Firstly, questioning the driving skill of the person based on their age limit is not prudent. A thirty-five year old person might have an improper driving sense whereas an eighteen year old person might hold a better driving skill. Thus, other factors such as proper eye sight, wise road should be considered for judging a person's coherence in driving.

Secondly, many argue that young drivers might get enthusiastic and emotional while driving, and often engage in rash driving. However, I feel that, it is the mentality and not the age, which evokes insane driving sense. Hence, a proper awareness should be created among the budding drivers to have control on their sense and speed while driving.

Furthermore, few section of the society believes that old people might have problem with driving, which causes road accidents. Although, age can influence a person's driving ability, it can never be the lone factor. For instance, a sixty five year old person can be hale and healthy, and thus eligible for driving. Hence, a check on fitness should be done to determine the driving capability.

Finally, every people should adhere the traffic rules strictly, which would greatly help in drastically reducing the road hazards. In conclusion, shrinking the range of driver's age alone will never reduce such calamities.

Clarification :
It is generally advised not to repeat words in an essay. Is it applicable to words like "driving" , "driver" as well? I found difficulty in finding a synonym for such basic words while writing the essay. Kindly help.

Thank you.
dumi 1 / 6,927 1592  
Nov 26, 2013   #2
The argument put forth is, limiting the eligible age for driving will in turn reduce the road accidents effectively.

Here you assume the reader knows the argument. However, you are supposed to introduce the argument to the reader assuming he or she does not know it :D

Follow the structure for the intro that I provided you for the other essay and conclude the paragraph with a clear statement that presents your opinion.

an eighteen year old person might hold a better driving skill.

...an eighteen year old person might hold better driving skills.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS Academic- stringent age rules to reduce the road accidents.