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TOEFL-Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are?


linying 5 / 14  
Oct 14, 2010   #1
TOEFL-Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are?

It is true that some products' advertisement describe them objectively, while most of time advertisers dramatize those normal products. The reason is that exaggerated advertisements make products far better than they really are.

Some advertisements use noticeable words to attract people's attention and most of them use hyperbole. For instance, there is a chocolate slogan that "If you eat the chocolate you will enjoy the happiness of falling in love". This slogan is absolutely impossible. People can feel sweet when they eat the chocolate but this feeling cannot be compared with the feel of love. Another example of a washing powder, Tide, can also justify my statement. It is publicized that there is a Tide, and there is no dirty. My mother was impressed by this slogan and bought one. The result was that this kind of washing powder can not make clothes as clean as what it is publicized.

Other advertisements use magnified and colorful pictures to increase people's willingness of shopping. When people hang in the supermarket, they can find various shining package on the products. And the pictures printed on the packages are totally different with the products inside. The most typical example is the advertisement of instant noodles. On the picture, the advertisers depict a bowl of delicious noodle with fresh vegetable and great amount of meat or shrimp. When people open the wrap, however, only a few dehydrate vegetables and dry noodles are shown in front of them. Where is the meat advertised in the picture? It just a method to make the products looks better.

What's more, the most influential advertisements are depended on famous people. By the influence of those famous people, consumers totally believe in what they say. Icons say this product is more efficient then it is definitely more useful. Some people use this method to make medicine commercials and this behavior has much negative influence on the society: many medicines advertised by famous people were attested to be unqualified. Although these medicines are not high quality, once they beautify advertisement, they will become panacea.

Therefore, advertisement can really make products seem perfect. We should open our eyes to justify whether they are good by ourselves.

alicepozzi 2 / 5  
Oct 14, 2010   #2
Hey, your essay has potential and you definitely provided good examples!

there you have just a few suggestions:


It is true that some products' advertisement describe them objectively, while most of time advertisers dramatize those normal products. The reason is that exaggerated advertisements make products look far better than they really are.

Some advertisements use noticeable words to attract people's attention and most of them use hyperboles . For instance, there is a chocolate slogan that says "If you eat the chocolate you will enjoy the happiness of falling in love". This slogan is absolutely impossible. People can taste sweet when they eat the chocolate but this feeling cannot be compared with the feel of love. Another example of a washing powder, Tide, can also justify my statement. It is publicized that if there is a Tide, and there is no dirty.

When people open the wrap, however, only a few dehydrate vegetables and dry noodles are shown in front of them
Ok, this is grammatically correct, but you don't want to use the passive form of the verb too much. Active form will make the reading smoother. So, there is my version: the only things that show up are a few dehydrate vegetables and dry noodles

advertisements are depended on famous peopleagain, you'd rather use the active form of the verb.depend on famous people

By the influence of those famous people, consumers totally believe in what they say.I'd phrase it that wayIn front of the opinions of such famous people, people cannot help but be interested in those advertised products.

Icons say this product is more efficient then it is definitely more useful.I don't understand what you're trying to say, sorry. It is a little bit unclear.

We should open our eyes to justifytest whether they are good by ourselves.

Have a great one!
OP linying 5 / 14  
Oct 14, 2010   #3
Thank you for your advice! I will revise my essay as you said.Thanks!!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,334 129  
Oct 17, 2010   #4
The reason is that exaggerated advertisements make products far better than they really are.

You should add the word "seem" to this sentence.

Here is a part that I will change slightly, so that the grammar will be correct:

It was publicized that if there is Tide, then there can be no dirt or stain. My mother was impressed by this slogan and bought one. The result was that she discovered that the advertisement had exaggerated. This kind of washing powder cannot make clothes as clean as the advertisements suggested . what it is publicized.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Oct 18, 2010   #5
Hi,

What's more, the most influential advertisements are dependeddependent on famous people (you can even use the word celebrities). By the influence of those famous people, consumers totally believe in what they say. When iI cons say thisa particular product is more efficient then people tend to believe themthink it is definitely more useful . Some people use this method to make medicine commercials and this behavior has much negative influence on the society: many medicines advertised by famous people were attested to be unqualified. Although these medicines are not high quality, once they beautify advertisementadvertised , they will become panacea.

To give some suggestions for you, I am rewriting your idea in a different format below;

Advertisers often use the glamour and fame of celebrities to persuade consumers to buy their products. These famous icons live in the hearts and minds of people and therefore the people generally tend to believe them, and more often try to imitate them. This tactic is often used by the advertisers to persuade people to purchase medicines that help boost one's physical strength or appearance. When celebrities apear on mass media and tell the world that some medicine had been the secret of their beauty or physical strength, that would make a major psychological impact on many people who watch that advertisement. In reality, such messages can be very misleading and probably may cause harm to health.


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