Argumentative essay- CBEST: "We succeed only as we identify in life a single overriding objective"

president D.Eisenhower statement

Please help me review my essay.

PROMPT: Former U.S president General D.Eisenhower once said, "We succeed only as we identify in life ....a single overriding objective and make all other considerations bend to that one objective." To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Write an essay for an audience of educated adults, stating your position. Use logical arguments and specific examples to support your position.

--------------------------------My Essay----------------------------------------------------------------------

I strongly agree with General D. Eisenhower that we succeed only as we identify in life a single overriding objective and make all other considerations bend to that one objective. This will help us to focus and have a sense of direction in our pursuit for success. Also, it will enable us to be masters and leaders in anything we have chosen to pursue in life. It will save time and success will be achieved faster if we identify our purpose and focus on it.

Identifying a particular objective and channeling all our attention towards it will help us to be more focused and have a sense of direction. And this yields success. Been focused helps us to work hard towards a particular goal. Moreover, who wants to mingle with someone who is going nowhere in life?. Thomas Edison who produced the light bulb identified what he wanted to produce and focused all his attention on it. Even after several failed attempts, he was able to produce the light bulb. Today, his name is in the history books as one of the greatest inventors. That is the outcome of identifying a particular goal, focusing on it, and achieving success.

In addition, this will help us to be masters and leaders in anything we have chosen to pursue in life. Do you remember the saying "jack of all trades is a master of none"? We become better and even professionals in a particular thing when we identify it, focused on it, and channel all our considerations towards it. This will not only make us successful but also help us to achieve it at the right time.

We can achieve success faster and time wastage will be avoided if we identify what we want to achieve and make every other considerations bend towards that. A student who identifies his passion to be a teacher will simply make inquiries. After that, he will acquire the right certifications and become a teacher. At this point he has achieved his goal. But someone who is not sure of what he wants, might end up jumping from one career to another. Which will delay him in achieving a particular goal.

In the final analysis, it is vital to identify to identify what we want in life and channel all our considerations towards it in order to achieve success. This will enable us to be focused, become professionals and save time. Remember a "stitch in time saves nine".

@Norbsidy
Hi there. Welcome to the forum. I hope you find the feedback helpful for your writing endeavors.

The first sentence could be sub-divided into two different ones. Bear in mind that clarity is critical, especially if you're working with the first portions of the essay. When you're merely touching the surface to relay the thesis statement of your essay, it is critical to ensure that you do not blur out any details.

Try to not be repetitive as well with your text. Take a look at your second paragraph's first sentences. You were continuously mentioning that the direction leads to a particular goal that is essential for success. Try to encompass these thoughts into a smaller single sentence instead of an intensive block of text.

Bear this in mind throughout your text.

@Maria,

Thank you for the responce. I will take corrections next time i write another essay.