What brings more merits - getting an occupation or continuing studies after finishing school?

SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT STUDYING AT UNIVERSITY OR COLLEGE IS THE BEST ROUTE TO A SUCCESSFUL CAREER

People hold different views on whether getting an occupation or continuing their studies after finishing school brings more merits. While a number of citizens believe that finding a profession would be better for them, I am committed to the notion that going to further education is more advantageous.

There are various compelling reasons why people should seek a job after finishing school. Firstly, due to the fact that they get a job earlier, they will be able to supplement their income. In that way, they can afford to buy their own home and start a family. Secondly, in terms of their career, the young who decide to find an occupation instead of continuing their studies may be promoted more quickly. By participating in training programs, employees have the opportunity to gain practical experience as well as learn new skills relevant to their careers.

Even though there are arguments against tertiary-level education, I am of the opinion that it is necessary to complete it after high school. From my perspective, academic degrees are required in a variety of professions. Without relevant qualifications, it is impossible to become doctors, lawyers, or lecturers. As a result, university graduates may have a greater chance of obtaining well-paying jobs after they graduate. Furthermore, labor markets have become competitive, and there are hundreds of applications competing for a position in companies. Consequently, citizens who do not have degrees may not be able to apply easily.

In conclusion, while there are some benefits of getting a job after high school, I still agree with those who think that going to tertiary-level education is more beneficial.

The scoring for this essay will not be as good as it could be. You should have used the correct response format to receive maximum scoring considerations on every level. This is an essay that follows the compare and contrast writing format. You should use the following format next time:

Sentence 1: Public opinion
Sentence 2: Reasons for the public to support it
Sentence 3: Your point of view on the public opinion
Sentence 4: Explain your opinion
Sentence 5: Use a transition example to prove your point as the correct one.

This format will create a comprehensive and cohesive explanation that will always receive higher markings from the examiner. Such a response completely meets the writing and discussion requirements for the task.

@Holt
that you mean those in body graph? sorry I dunno exactly what u mean to improve my writing