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Broad knowledge or Specific knowledge? Broader knowledge is more important; TOEFL


g2080800 3 / 6  
Dec 30, 2012   #1
Hello,
I have a TOEFL practice essay need everyone's help to revise for me. Thank you for your kindly correction.

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
It is better to have broad knowledge of many academic subjects than to specialize in one specific subject.

In this competitive society, obtaining different kinds of knowledge is necessary. You may have to encounter your competitors who know more than you; therefore, the following reasons show my opinion in agreeing with the former one.

To begin with, many people would take one major in their campus life because they think it is enough to face the competition of the outside world. However, they neglect the fact that there are many students who sharpen their own competency by taking the additional academic subjects. For instance, if you are going to interview occupancy of international business, most people might think that it would absolutely suitable for the one who majored in the business to take it. Nevertheless, if you have taken the extra subjects like the second language and so on. You are definitely has the superiority than other interviewee.

Furthermore, many people regard taking too many academic subjects are wasting their time. Nevertheless, the y disregarded the fact that it is their opportunities to explore and develop their interests, which may become the basis of creating their own entrepreneurship. For instance, most successful people have the same characteristics of not losing the chance in learning. They will grab each minor chance to attend the forum or making with friends in different fields so that they can expand their relationship with a varieties of backgrounds people. Besides, through taking different subjects, you can have broad knowledge and to implement all the materials that you've learned on the future career and find out your own interests via learning.

All in all, we should try to broaden our horizons by learning different subjects not only enhance the competitive among finding the job but also find out what you like and the interest that will lead you to the better future career life. Never lose any chance which can fulfill you life.

dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Dec 30, 2012   #2
In this competitive society, obtaining different kinds of knowledge is necessary. You may have to encounter your competitors who know more than you; therefore, the following reasons show my opinion in agreeing with the former one.
Overall it's a good introduction that follows the required structure. However, you need to align it more with the prompt :) Here's my suggestion;

In this competitive society, one needs a broader knowledge for survival. The reason is that he always needs to compete with others who may be having a broader knowledge in various fields. There for I believe that one would need to concentrate on gaining knowledge from various academic disciplines and following are my reasons for holding this opinion;
AryanK 5 / 20 3  
Dec 30, 2012   #3
Its more like liberal arts...you seem to promote liberal arts background so I guess add some more skills and competencies that one can develop with the broad based knowledge like self confidence, ability to deal with the information,technology and researches, creativity, critical thinking etc. and dumi please help me with my essay too i ll appreciate your help and remarks.


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