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[IELTS] Causes and solutions for increasing average weight in some countries



Juniedang 3 / 9  
Jan 12, 2016   #1
In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health and fitness is decreasing.

What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience


Increase in citizens' average weight is currently witnessed in different countries. This has raised a concern among society about the level of people's health and fitness. By that, busy pace of life as well as technology development can be addressed as the root causes of this issue, and it also requires several resolutions to tackle it.

First, higher average weight is plausibly originated from modern busy lifestyle. People tend to spend more time in the workplace, hence less time on recreation. As a consequence, this has affected their eating and exercising habits in an adverse manner. For instance, increasing number of American residents choose fast food in lieu of cooked meals for their dinners. They also have less time spent on doing exercises or physical activities. In some industrialized cities like Ho Chi Minh, there even exists almost no outdoor areas appropriate for exercising and entertainment.

Second, the advancement of technology partly contributes to the deteriorating level of habitants' health as well. Online diversion has become enormously popular with a wide range of options. Urban citizens retain the preference to play online games, use social networks, or stick to their mobile phones or laptops rather than getting out for real life interactions. According to an article in 2013, each person spends one and a half hours on average per day on Facebook and similar social networks. This amount of time literately could have been used for doing exercises to improve fitness level.

There have been numerous attempts worldwide to address this issue. First, Government should help residents to afford a work life balance. To be specific, in some European countries, proposals have been raised to reduce working hours from eight to seven per day. Furthermore, there should be restrictions on fast food advertisements. Instead, restaurants with nutritious cuisine, those from Japan for example, should be welcomed. Meanwhile, it still remains the most challenging task to tackle the problems caused by advance technology as it is the matter of personal decision. However, as long as the number of working hours declines as aforementioned and there are more outdoor playgrounds to be built, the probability of residents switching to physical entertainment may increase.

In conclusion, busy pace of modern life and technology advancement are to blame for increasing weight pattern of citizens from certain nations. Although it has raised serious concerns among society, appropriate resolutions can be implemented to tackle the issue.

vangiespen - / 4077  
Jan 12, 2016   #2
Junie, the score for this type of writing, as far as I am concerned, should be somewhere around the 6 and above bracket. I am sure that you already understand how the IELTS written tasks are assessed and graded so I don't have to go into greater detail as to why I believe that you deserve that score. Now, some other assessor might score it differently but I do not believe that it will be getting a score lower than 6.

Just keep on doing the practice tests and I am sure your skills will continue to grow. Your grasp of the English language is impressive enough and shows that you have dedicated yourself to the study of the language. That said, it will still take years before you reach the native speaker level of English communication. You don't have to worry though, you are on the right track and should be achieving that status soon.

I hope to see more practice tests from you in the future. You just need to be guided in the proper manner until the day that you have to take the test. I would be honored to continue helping you with honing your written English skills :-)


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