What are the characteristics of a good coach? (TOEFL Independent Writing)

a combination of various values and qualities

It is common between people to think that coaches withhold a crucial role in the success of individuals as well as teams in whichever adventure they takes be it a sport, be it yoga and meditation, be it developing a healthy lifestyle. To achieve their fundamental role, coaches need to have certain qualities mandatory to the high standard they must keep in their work. I, myself, see that a coach needs to be a critical thinker, a fervent motivator and, simply, someone who takes great pleasure in his work.

First of all, critical thinking is not just of help to researchers, teachers and students in academia, yet also is crucial for coaches. Indeed, a coach needs to think clearly about the multiple variables involved in the success of their trainees. For instance, the situation of an athlete that has just a time frame of one month before an important tournament is largely different from an athlete that is going to take part in the Olympics in four years. The coach, here, has to know which training system is convenient to which athlete, and hence, having a fixed, preset training routine does not help the coach's cause. Thus, a coach that can position himself well in the picture and that can see the advantages as well as the faults of his methods is ready to work.

Furthermore, a coach needs to have a sense of motivation that he transfers to his trainees. Motivation, a term that is commonly used wrongly, is what inspires people to push forward and expand their limits. And from personal experience, I can confirm the importance of having a coach capable of providing the necessary motivation. For a soccer game, my team and I, we had to travel for 5 hours by bus to play. Coming to the field, our energy as drained and we were in no way ready to feature in the game. The coach's words, his manner in talking and the passion you can sense with every letter he spills out, somehow magically, gave us the determination needed to play at our best. If anything, a good coach is determined by his ability to change his trainees' mindsets.

Lastly, the trainee cannot enjoy, and hence, work hard if his trainer is, indeed, not in the mood or not keen on the work he/she does. Therefore, a coach needs to be passionate about his work. In fact, the most respected coaches, notably in sports, history has given us are indeed extremely keen on what they do. Passion and interest in a certain field allows these coaches to pay attention to the tiniest of details and therefore offer the best training experience. For example, Ex-Chelsea manager and Tottenham Hotspurs manager, Jose Mourinho, has one of the most intricate Soccer training routines in the world, a routine he thoroughly executed for his 30-year career. He pays attention even to the hotels the players stay in, their food, and even their personal relationships and habits.

Overall, we must admit that a good coach should be a combination of various values and qualities that expand upon the aforementioned qualities. However, I believe critical thinking, flexibility, the ability to motivate and being passionate about one's work are the most important of these qualities.

*** Please give it a grade out of 15.

@Sunrise011
Out of 15, I would give this essay an 8. It definitely is passable, however there were key parts of the writing that could have been improved.

For one, you have a tendency to overdo your sentences in a way that they appear to be run-on rather than a smoother writing pattern. What I suggest is dealing with simplified sentences first before you build up the length. That way, you will evade being "too much" in a sense.

Furthermore, it is imperative to be mindful of being specific when you are writing. There's a very thin line between the three values that you pushed forward here; hence, it would difficult to discern whether or not the writing is actually tailor-fit to what concept you are introducing. Be very careful of this, especially since you need to focus more on ensuring that you are properly being understood by your readers.