IELTS: Children spend long time studying in school. What are the effects?

I'm prepare for the IELTS in 18th. May. Exhausted and nervous. Help me with my essay~ Thanks a lot! Looking for your commentsïź

Task 2: Children spend long time studying in school and after school. What are the positive and negative effects on children and society they live in?

More and more kids are engaged in countless classes in school and after school. As this phenomenon is on an upward trend, the discussion over it also becomes hotter and hotter. And it mostly focuses on whether it can bring positive or negative impacts on the development of both children and society.

It is quite evident that certain academic trainings lead to better academic performance, which hleps children get higher educated qualifications. It is all konwn that academic qualifications are essential for getting a reasonable career. In addition, continuous academic trainings form the basis of students' critical thinking and rigorous scientific attitudes in the future. And this well-trained students are likely to become leading figures or pioneers in thier study feilds. Therefore, it is admitted that long-time study has positive influence on our community to some extent.

However, opponents including me argue that the aims of education should not be restricted to the development of knowledge or skill. Instead, educators should ensure that today's students will become productive and well-adjusted adults of tomorrow. That is to say, parents and educators should pay attention to both students' academic attainment and mental status.

In terms of measures to this problem, to let children take active part in extra-curricular activities is an advisable way. Because this kind of activities offers studends an outlet of creativity and problem-solving. These two charactristics have a siginificant impact on children's lifelong development. And these are exactly the kind of talents that our society are looking for, as they are superior to those who focus on study only in handling complex situations.

In conclusion,personally speaking, academic training is irreplaceable in children's development. There is no substitue for after-school activities neither. To find a middle position between these two factors is an ideal approach, which will result in students' less time expense but better academic performance.

, I personally think that the studying after school might be homework rather than "classes" again.


Actually, the topic is looking for "what" positive and negative effects on it rather than "whether" it has.


these well-trained students



current


, it looks out of topic


Wish you luck on 18th May

thank you~

As the competition grows, kids too become victims of it. They attend countless number of classes, both school and private, as a result of this phenomenon.


You need to support your reasons with specific examples. Don't crowd your body paragraphs with too many reasons. Pick one good reason and state it. Then support it with a specific example.

Hi guys. I also agree that eileenalien did not clarify his reasons. However, with those abstract topics, it's hard to give specific examples. I also try to get new first paragraph and hope it could give some specific examples. Let's discuss this to help us surmount these abstract questions.

Using most time in learning helps children reach the academic qualification. Focusing on study when they were kids gives children a learning and researching habit. This may lead to an important role of study in their daily routine as they are growing. Hence, children will easily get higher education known as academic qualification such as MBA or PhD. In addition, with academic qualification, these educators will improve their major knowledge and ensure their advantages in curriculum vitae for the job. Therefore, spending time in study will be very useful for children in the future.

... I don't think it is that hard. In this instance;


... here the issue is that eillen doesn't come up with the actual reason. Reason is competitiveness and because of that children are forced to develop their skills faster. If eileen said this, then it is easy to give a specific example like;

Unlike earlier generations, children today learn English from a very young age. This is because good command of English would be an added advantage for a person when he has to compete for jobs.

Hi dumi. Oh,I got your comment. Elieen didnt give the best reason for it. However, due to the pressure of the test, students may give some reasons as that of Elieen. it becomes abstract. Hence, I said it's so hard to give specific examples. And It's hard for me to surmount that.

I know... it's mostly the pressure that you have to struggle with. The best way to tackle it is to train your mind to follow the 4 para structure when you are doing practice essays. Then automatically you tend to think of a reason and a simple specific example to back it up with. When you already know the example, you can shape up the reason to go hand in hand with the example. Also, you can pick up lots of points by reading others' essays written on similar topics. :)

Hi Dumi.

Your advice is very useful. :D. When I read the "actual reason". I think that I broaden my mind about writing essay which is hard for me. :D.

I always like reading your comments :)).