Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


Companies Should Recruit People Who are Able to Work in Team and Dutiful



Anna94 47 / 50  
Nov 30, 2016   #1
SOME PEOPLE THINK WHEN RECRUITING, COMPANIES SHOULD AIM TO TAKE ON PEOPLE WHO ARE INNOVATIVE AND ABLE TO WORK INDEPENDENTLY WHILE OTHERS CONSIDERED THEY SHOULD RECRUIT PEOPLE WHO ARE ABLE TO WORK IN A TEAM AND FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.

The successful companies sometimes depend on employee's way of working, so business entity should recruit workers who are creative and do not rely on others. While others regard it should be better to gather employees who are able to work in squad and dutiful. This essay will discuss how independent workers sometimes bring difficulties for company and then benefit of gaining obedient employees, which I tend to the second notion because they will help company to attain the purposes.

Having innovative and independent workers are good for certain enterprise. They can be given a lot of tasks and responsibility, but it will be hard for company. Because the type of these workers sometimes authoritatively to themselves, they think that they have a brilliant idea, which they can achieve by their own way. This is supported by the study from Osaka University that 52% self-reliant workers were dismissed due to the reason that they did not follow the company rules. Even though they had contributed some good idea, but their attitude caused damage to the enterprise.

On the other hand, obedient workers and those who are able to work in team bring benefit for company. Since they will unite their thought to reach the purposes, take Google Incorporation's employees as an example. They always perform meeting to discuss company's objectives. Those who have pointed to work in squad will do their duty together while notice the company's regulation, and Internet users can see how Google shows their innovation such as in appearance and data updates. Personally, I tenacious stand at this notion since working in team is able to gain good concepts for the best achievement. It is also cannot be harmful due to the reason that they have analyzed it before doing.

All in all, it may be good to have genius workers who can work independently, but sometimes it brings drawbacks to the company because of their character. However, I strongly supported the notion that dutiful team workers are able to back company's aim up to the good accomplishment. 340w

ichanpants89 16 / 742  
Nov 30, 2016   #2
Anna, I can see that your writing is getting better. I do really like the way you elaborate your ideas coherently. Yet, I can still notice some rooms for improvements. In relation to Lexical Resource, if you want to attain band 6 or above, you are suggested to use "less common vocabulary". When you take a closer look at your essay and proofread it several times, it is noticeable that the level of words that you use is still ranging from basic to intermediate. There are six stages of vocabulary such as, A1, A2 (basic), B1, B2,(intermediate) C1, C2 (advanced) according to Cambridge English dictionary online. For instance, in this essay, mentioning "good" (A1 level of word) five times cannot improve your score in terms of Lexical Resource. It is more likely that you can only reach 5.0 due to that problem. Therefore, my suggestion is that you just need to alter the frequent usage of "good" into several alternative vocabularies such as, outstanding/remarkable/valuable to improve your lexical resource score. It might look simple but this is one of the essential categories in assessing an IELTS essay.

Hope this helps :)


Home / Writing Feedback / Companies Should Recruit People Who are Able to Work in Team and Dutiful
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳