A comparison between online shopping in New Zealand

The pie charts show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

The pie charts illustrate the proportion of online shopping retail areas during a decade period in developed country. Overall, it can be seen that film/music figures had the highest sales amount in 2013. While travel had fallen from first position to second position, others were the least popular among consumers.

According to the data, there was a dramatic rise in the percentage of film/music from 21% to 33% over 10 year following as the highest proportion of sales. On the other hand, in 2013 travel figures sold few less than film/music by under a very small number which was 4 %, causing film/music overtook its previous place in 2003.

Meanwhile, between 2003 and 2013 witnessed gradual decline by just under a minority in the amount of clothes sales. It replaced position of book as the least popular retail of online shopping in New Zealand over past a decade whereas book figures inclined slightly to 22% in 2013.

• 
  TEST5.jpg
  

What app miss tira, your essay is good, i have suggestions to your introduction paragraph.

you could use this pattern :
1. Reserve some of the information, paraphrase and use some synonyms.
2. Overview the information


A comparison of the presentation of online market at a particular spot during a decade before 2003 in developing nations is revealed in pie charts. Overall, it can be seen that the figure for film and music had the highest sales while the rate of travel fall to second position, others were the least popular among consumers in the last period of assessment.