Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


IELTS: consumer expense on different items (food/drink/tobacco/clothes/leisure etc)



fahime 1 / 1  
Feb 24, 2012   #1
Dear friends,
I really appreciate if you could help me with your comments.
thanks inadvance,
Fahime
The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Write at least 150 words.

The table shows how people of five different countries spend their money on various items in 2002. It can be seen that the amount of consumer expenditure varies considerably across the different items but all of them follows approximately similar descending trend on these three included items.

According to figures, in all countries,the highest proportion of citizens' expenditure have been allocated to food,drinks and Tobacco; whereas, leisure and education which have the lowest percentage after what people spends on clothing and foot wear.

Meanwhile, Turkish and Irish people spend the highest amount of their money on food, drinks and Tobacco with 32.4% and 28.9%, respectively; however, Swedish people spends the least amongst others by only 15.77%. About Clothing and Footwear, Italian citizens have the first stage by 9% and Swedish by 5.4% has been placed in the last stage and other countries similarly spend around 6% of their expenditure on this item. Although leisure and education include the lowest proportion of money spent on in all countries, It has the highest amount in Turkey which is 2 times more than the lowest amount in Irland and Spain by 2.21%and 1.98%, respectively.

In conclusion, It can be seen that food, drinks and Tobacco contain between 1/3 or 1/4 of total amount of consumers expenditures of all countries. After that people spend only between 5 to 6 percents on Clothing and Footwear and finally the lowest amount which is less than 4% on leisure and education.

minhtung9x 2 / 6  
Feb 24, 2012   #2
Meanwhile, Turkish and Irish people spent . Wrong tense ! Check all the Verb and add Past tense :D
OP fahime 1 / 1  
Feb 26, 2012   #3
Many thanks for your help
I think using present tense is possible here!isn't it?!would u please explain more?
what is your idea about whole structure of my essay except tenses? How I can improve?


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS: consumer expense on different items (food/drink/tobacco/clothes/leisure etc)
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳