There are contradictory opinions about hosting athletics events in a country

Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think that bad.

Discuss both views and state your opinion.

There are contradictory opinions about athletics events. While it is deemed that there is a benefit for the country when hosting the event, others show an opposite viewpoint. In this piece of writing, both views are clarified before the author's opinion is reached.

On the one hand, the advantage of creating international sports events is rational. The well-known of this country will be spreaded, which hosts sports events. For instance, Qatar was the host of the World Cup 2023. Most people who are enthusiastic about soccer know and become popular until now. Besides that, the economy in this country will be drastically increased. In general, people who love sports will fly to this country and see the football match as closely as possible. Additionally, journalists will post information about the match for everyone in the world fastly. All of these things make this country will be earned an enormous fortune.

On the other hand, others think that international sports events should be limited. Because of large events, everything's need to be prepared carefully without errors. If the event showed worse infrastructure, the reputation of this country would decrease. In order to host an event, the country will give too much money spending on the pitch and stadium. The more money country uses, the more poverty people become.

In short, agreement and disagreement about sports events are somewhat reasonable. I am inclined to the opinion that people need freedom about hosting a sports event in their country.

This refers to local and small sports events. An additional descriptor is required to meet the "international" reference. Words along the lines of global, universal, or intercontinental come to mind. Adding any of these words before "athletic events" would have allowed you to create a very accurate paraphrasing of the reference from the original presentation. The lack of it makes your rewording inaccurate.


2 things wrong with this reference. First, you are the author so you do not need to say "author's opinion". Take charge of the essay and use personal first person pronouns since that is stated in the writing instruction. Second, you should be indicating your opinion as a part of your opinion statement. That opinion statement is missing from this presentation so you will not receive a score for that aspect of consideration.

Both these problems already indicate a weakly presented essay discussion foundation. It will affect the overall score. A review of the essay shows that your personal opinion was only presented in the concluding summary. Meaning you did not truly meet the scoring requirements in terms of presentation and format. The personal opinion needs to have a stand alone explanation. There also needs to be a proper reference to third person opinion / pronouns throughout to clarify that you are presenting a public opinion explanation and not your own in the relevant paragraphs. Basically, you have not met the requirements for a passing essay since this is an under developed and little explained presentation that does not contain a proper concluding summary.

@Holt
Thank you