Control over happiness - 'people gain happiness differently' (SAT)

Is happiness something over which people have no control？
Happiness is something like the key to treasure.It can be readily stated that without happiness,one can never find his or her true self.Both external and internal environment motive people to seek happiness.Through literature, one can see how this statement proves to be true.

Happiness is sometimes imposed by outside,as is seen in the novel 'Great expectation'. Living in a with a blacksmith,Joe,Pip had constantly cherished the hope that he would become a gentry one day.Before he inherited the large sum of money,Pip was somewhat ashamed with his inferior friends and his own identity.In contrast, Estella's ascendence seemed beyond his reach.Therefore,Pip was increasingly discontented with his life in the forge.When he became a gentleman,however, he led a squander life and was shocked to hear that Estella is already married.Morever,as his benefactor(the convict) was imprisoned again,his 'great expectation' extinguished. Pip was beated by this series of disaster.After an extended period of sickness during which he is looked after by Joe,Pip introspected what he once pursued and united with Joe.Initially, the environmental contrast incented Pip to pursue a better status.However,when his dream disillusioned,he was able to confront the reality and retrieved his nature and his affection with Joe.

At the same time,we acquire happiness from our experiences.In the novel Pride and Prejudice，The protagonist, Elizabeth Bennet and Mr Darcy obtained eternal love through an arduous journey. At first,Elizabeth was irritated by Darcy's arrogance and coldness.Her misapprehension about Darcy deepened when her sister's marriage was vandalized and Wickham's fradulent remarks on Darcy prevailed.As a result,everytime they met,the air was embarrassing and unfriendly.However,Elizabeth was astounded when Darcy interpreted his "haughty"manner,which disabused Elizabeth of her many mistakes.Through her experience in pemberly, Elizabeth testified what Darcy said.Both apologized for their previous arrogance and eventually led a happy life.Their gradual acquaintance and willingnesses to understand better account for the reason why they could find their deficency and accept each other.

People gain happiness differently.These two exemples, though in literature, exemplify the two path through which happiness is pursued.By acting in our own way or being affected, we finally reach the same goal.

needless words and awkward description??

Both external and internal environments motive people to seek happiness.Through literature, one can see how this statement proves to be true.

Happiness is sometimes imposed by outside generated by forces outside the person, as is seen in the novel Great Expectations.

However,when his dream he becomes disillusioned, he is able to confront the reality and retrieved his nature and his affection with Joe. (now add one more sentence to connect this to the idea of happiness).

At the same time,we acquire happiness from our inner experiences.--- I added the word inner to make it support the thesis statement.

I like your theme of outer and inner sources of happiness!!

:-)

The last sentenced should be fixed to through literature not though literature. I would also work on conclusion. Hope I helped. Overall, it was a nice essay.

(1)If you use "both" at the beginning of the sentence, then the subject should be composed of two units. So we can use either external and internal environments or external environment and internal environment.

(2) In regard to the verb, the word "motive" is apparent a noun, the verb of which should be "motivate". Besides "motive", it also has another noun form , namely , motivation.


He was shocked by the news that Estella had got married when he became a gentleman living an extravagant life eventually.

There are two points in your sentence needing to be pointed out.
(1) tense conflict. ... to hear that ...
(2) squander V. which means spending extravagantly, here I substitute "extravagant" for it.

PS. All mentioned above is only my personal opinion. Welcome to discuss and criticise.

The first sentence, which should aptly give the first impression, is quite prolix and obscure. To say that it is something is rather saying nothing. So the expression, in this case, should be changed to "Happiness is somewhat the key to treasure." Yet "the key to treasure" remains so gloomy in meaning--what treasure is it?

The second sentence is useless for the purpose of transiting ideas--what it has to do with external or internal environments (and you should now realize an error in phrasing nouns) in the next sentence is not explained nor understood.

The third sentence is grammatically mistaken. "Motive" is not a verb, which is irrelevant for the sentence has no main verbs. Thus this word should be changed to "motivate."

The last sentence fails to envision the question as well as your statement whether you sanctions or dissents with the question.


The first sentence, as the topic sentence, fails to conjure the idea, as its grammatical phase is not yet acceptable.

The next sentence, probably penalized for the absence of conjunctions, is particularly flawed. "Joe and Pip cherished the hope that he..."--who is he? Both "Joe" and "Pip" are boy names.

The following sentences conform a great deal of mistakes. Failing to ensure correct spellings is evidently one: "morever", "ascendence", so on and so forth. Mistakes in upholding correct participles are also visible in the word 'beated." Also, obviously inaccurate conjunctiions are used. In the sixth sentence (if my counting is correct), the conjunction "however" is inconceivable. Sufficing that the preceding sentence has stated that his life readily goes down, it is not hard to imagine that as a man, his life is vastly devastated. In this sentence, a tense conflict also occurs. On and on mistakes composed, I believe it is not careful and motivated of you not to proofread your very work.


May I ask what "fradulent" means--no, what "fradulent" even is? As well, "pemberly"? Misspelt words are inserted into your post: "everytime", "deficency"...

Also, "willingnesses" is no word. "Willingness" adopts no plural form, for it is uncountable.


Proofreading is particularly hard for you, is it not? "Exemples" is a peculiar word to my ears, and I believe it should be "examples." Also, "though in literature" means "despite literature", which is clearly unsuitable here. However, what I find most bemusing is the way in which you put "two" and "path" together indifferently, without realizing your very mistake. Have you typed these words without even re-looking?

Overall, your post does not embody the question "Is happiness something over which people have no control?" It does not cover any of the perceivable aspects. Therefore to say, your post is quite irrelevant.

And yet again to say, I anticipate better work next time.